Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
by Misery666
Summary: Isabella Swan is married to a Vampire and is soon turning into one herself. And when she is turned, why do the Volturi want her now more than ever? Set after eclipse. Rated M just in case. R&R if you will... thanx.
1. Bliss

Summary: Isabella Swan is married to a Vampire and is soon turning into one herself. And when she is turned, why do the Volturi want her now more than ever? Set after eclipse.

AN: Yay! A new story! Especially one about my favorite book! Or should I say books. Yes well… this is my second story and hopefully it does better than my other one. Thank you. Enjoy!

P.S. This story is named after my favorite song. And it does have relevance ok. D

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or anything that has to do with them and the characters. Nor will I ever in the future. And I also do not own Daft Punk's Song 'Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger'. I just like it very much.

Chapter One

Bliss

Mrs. Isabella Marie Cullen. That is my name now, and I wouldn't wish it any other way. I do have to admit that I miss my old last name now and then. But being together with Edward Cullen, the man of my dreams. It's easy to forget what I miss.

Smiling to myself, I felt a pair of cold arms wrap around me. It was nice to wake up next to the one I'm going to spend the rest of eternity with. I turned my head over my right shoulder to meet a pair of bright topaz eyes, staring into my very soul. Ironic enough.

"Good morning Mrs. Cullen," He breathed, letting me take in his intoxicating scent. I nearly fainted, "Did you sleep well?" I nodded not wanting to ruin this moment with my imperfect human voice, he began humming my lullaby. Closing my eyes, listening to his melodic voice I breathed slowly.

Suddenly my eyes shot open from all the memories of what happen last night as they began to flood back to me. Blushing big time, I scrunched my eyes closed in complete embarrassment. I was hoping that Edward didn't catch me.

"I suppose you finally remember what happened last night. Hm?" I could feel that crooked smile behind me and I knew that he did. Almost making me want him all over again and scream in humiliation. Feeling overwhelmingly embarrassed with that thought, I blushed even more. He merely chuckled. I am so glad he can't hear my thoughts, because, this would be very embarrassing.

Starting to get restless, Edward began brushing his cold lips along my bare shoulder. "I hate not knowing what you're thinking." I inwardly smirked. '_Right on cue…_'

"Well, now you know how I feel." Finally not feeling embarrassed. I smiled knowingly. I didn't even notice that I had moved until I felt something cold above me, only to figure out it was Edward that was above me smiling that cooked smile I love. Blushing furiously, I felt cold lips touch my own.

Trying very hard to stay conscious, I wrapped my arms around his neck, never wanting to let go.

Not caring about how self-conscious I was feeling at the moment, I spread my legs and felt his cold body move in-between. Forming into my own once again.

Yes, this must be heaven.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: yay! Its done! No I'm just kidding. Haha. Yup chapter one! Love it! Ok but I promise the others will be longer its just… I thought this scene deserved its own chapter and it's the beginning so don't worry. FYI, It is rated M for a reason. Lol.

Hopefully I will be updating periodically. If you want to give me any feedback or anything go right on ahead. Do you like my story so far? D

Amanda out-

(AKA: Misery666 out-)


	2. Girl Talk

AN: Yay I'm already back for chapter two! I just love Twilight! It's making me so giddy its kind of scaring me. Haha. Well enjoy!

Disclaimer: Once again… I own nothing.

Chapter Two

Girl Talk

"Bella! I know that being a human causes you to be slower than us vampires but I'm pretty sure that _all_ humans aren't this slow!" Alice was really starting to get on my nerves this morning. Of course, I could never stay mad at her for long.

Today Alice wanted to take me shopping. I wasn't really surprised that she wanted to do this, but I was surprised that she asked. Usually she just 'kidnaps' me and takes me to some unknown place.

But I guess with my transformation being surprisingly tomorrow, she wanted to do as much as we could before the 'change'. I couldn't blame her for wanting to do things while I'm _still_ human, so I didn't complain… much.

"Don't make me use your full name! Hurry up or I will be forced to dress you myself!" Alice was standing right outside my bathroom door. Obviously in a major hurry, and probably debating whether or not she should just barge in.

This morning went very slowly. First I woke up with Edward nowhere in sight. Then, even with me waiting he didn't come back, which left me angry and nearly depressed. And now, I have Alice yelling at me through the bathroom door, urging me to get dressed faster.

She rarely yells at me but with time so sparse, I know she just wants to spend as much time with me as possible.

"Bella!" Great, now whining. If I didn't know any better, I'd think she was singing.

"Hold on, I'll be right out." I called through the door. Grimacing, I finally put on my long sleeved white shirt and blue jeans. Quickly drying my hair, I put on some socks.

Opening the door, I saw Alice beaming with her topaz eyes gleaming in the light above her. Exposing her angelic features that left any man speechless. Hell, it left me speechless.

"Ok now hurry! Put your jacket and shoes on and lets go! We're gonna have so much fun!" I felt Alice's petite hands push me along to the bed and at vampire speed danced around the room. Before I even knew she moved, she was in front of me with my jacket and shoes.

I took them graciously and put them both on. I stood up and Alice immediately scooped me up and we were out the door into the chilling air. We were going so fast it took me a few seconds to realize we were already in her car and driving until we drove out of the somewhat driveway and out on the ice road. Buckled in and everything.

I guess Alice finally decided to slow down a bit since she drove at normal speed. 90 miles per hour. Well, I guess normal for the Cullen's. '_Which I guess I am now, a Cullen._' A smile covered my face as I thought that.

Since we were driving at a reasonable speed, I decided to look outside at all the tundra's and glorious snow. Seemed like I was on cloud nine, literally.

About two weeks ago Edward and I arrived at Tanya's empty house. Edward had informed me that Tanya and her coven had decided to leave for just a little bit, at least until my transformation had been completed. Also to give Edward and I some privacy… Which I was very thankful for.

Since Alice had surprised me with her presence this morning, I guessed her and everyone else had arrived this morning too. Back in Forks, the story Carlisle and Esme had explained was a job opening that Carlisle couldn't refuse and his whole family decided to move with them.

But before that, Edward and I got married behind his beautiful home in the backyard. Charlie gave me away, and Renée was there to snap billions of pictures beside Phil. I had to admit that Alice really did out due herself. I thought I would dread every minute of it, but it was actually the best day of my life. Even with all the chatter and gossip, I didn't care, because I was officially with Edward. Bound together with him forever.

I chuckled remembering that day Edward and I informed Charlie about our engagement. That was one awkward conversation. Especially when Charlie thought we were only engaged because I was pregnant or something. Wow was that hard to compute! I could tell that throughout the entire conversation, Edward was just itching to burst out in laughter.

"Hm." A certain Cullen crossed my mind. '_Maybe Alice knows where he is._' I thought. I turned to face her to notice she was already staring at me.

"Yes Bella?" She asked. I stammered. Alice was kind of acting weird recently. Since this morning she's been kind of quiet. Not extremely quiet but quiet enough to know something isn't right.

"Um. Do you know where Edward is?" She quickly returned her attention to the road and spoke.

"He went hunting with Emmett and Jasper." Probably seeing my confusion plastered on my face, she continued, "Well… it's mostly for precautions. Especially with what… um… you two have been doing… um… I think he's just making sure he has as much control as possible. Enough control to lose control, wouldn't you say?" My cheeks felt like they were on fire. Maybe that was it. My eyes widened in realization. '_Oh god… she saw a vision of Edward and me… oh god._' Bringing my left hand up to hide my shame, I sunk into my seat.

"And I do have to say Bella," I looked at her between my fingers, not surprised to see her fighting to keep her smile off, "I am scarred for eternity." She teased. Flushing, I turned away from her, putting both hands over my eyes. I heard her harmonious laughter, and I groaned.

"It's ok Bella. I _am_ a girl." Still hearing her giggle profusely, I groaned even louder.

"Hey, you wanna talk embarrassing? Try getting a vision of your brother and his wife like… meshing… _while_ you're kissing your own husband." I couldn't help but laugh. But then I blushed even more when I had a mental picture of Alice kissing Jasper, and then suddenly getting the vision of Edward and myself. I cringed at the thought.

"Yeah… I thought so." Still laughing with a tiny bit of embarrassment left over, I looked out my window. Everything looked the same, and it seemed like we were going in circles. I trusted Alice though, with every vibe in my body.

"So… where are we going?" I just had to ask.

"Well, since there isn't that much out here, I just wanted to show you a town. It's not that big but its pretty nice, and the clothes are gorgeous. I'm sure you'll like it. It's a 5-hour drive there and back from Tanya's house. But don't worry. We'll be there in 20 seconds." With that said, she punched down the gas pedal letting her yellow Porsche glide down the road. Hearing the engine purr, I knew we were in for a long day.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

My feet ached, my back hurt, and I missed Edward. In short… I was done.

Who knew a town this small would be such a work out? But, Alice was wrong. I didn't like it… I loved it. I was actually very excited when we arrived. But as the day progressed, my happiness was spent. Even in a place I fell in love with, I was exhausted.

Slowly dragging my feet around in the clothing department, I yawned. Alice turned around and noticed how tired I was. Then she asked something completely unexpected.

"Are you scared? About becoming one of us?" While still walking along the row of clothing, she watched my face and I could tell she was trying to read me. Looking at her curiously, I responded nonchalant.

"No." I didn't really want to tell her the truth, because I was kind of scared… but not for the reasons that Edward thinks. Mostly because I don't know if I'll be strong enough. I can only hope that I am.

Remembering when James had bitten me, I looked down at my scar, and shuddered.

Quickly returning my gaze to her, I looked up, hoping she hadn't seen me think back to that horrible memory.

Alice looked up and smiled at me, and I knew immediately she did see me. Telling from her face, she could tell I was lying too. Mentally slapping myself, I sighed.

"It's ok to be scared. I think it's different from an ordinary change because you're expecting this to happen. As for the others, and myself, we had no idea until it actually _did_ happen. But don't worry; it's going to be fine. Your change is going to go through smoothly, I promise," Turning toward me, she winked, "Believe me." Tapping to her right temple, she smiled reassuringly.

She turned swiftly toward the rack and grabbed a couple of clothes and turned to me one last time and headed to the back of the store. For a second, I thought she was going to take off with it through the emergency exit, but then I saw she was going for the dressing room and slightly chuckled. Shrugging off that ridiculous thought.

She turned around and faced me again.

"I'm going to try some things on ok? I'll be right back." I nodded and watched as she disappeared into the doorway of the dressing room. Near the doorway was a vacant chair. I sat down in the chair resting my feet and legs, letting my thoughts consume me.

'_Where did all the time go?_' I mean, it seemed like only a few days had gone by. But no, it had been _two weeks!_ I couldn't really believe it myself. And to top it all off, I was going to become part of the coven... tomorrow. A breath caught in my chest.

'_Am I ready for this?_' I shook my head from those thoughts. '_No second thoughts. I love Edward. I love the Cullen family. How could I ever think that! I want this more than anything in the entire world. Being able to spend an eternity with Edward, is everything I could ask for. I __**am**__ ready. More than I could ever be._'

Smiling to myself I sat waiting, eager to get home and see my one true love. Eager for what awaits for me tomorrow.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Ha HA! 2nd chapter up and running! See I told you it would be longer! Hehe. :D even though I don't think its my best… I still wrote it! For you :P haha.

Wow! Thank you guys so much! For the reviews and everything!

And this is a personal thanks from me! To you who _have_ reviewed.

Thanks,

**Edward'sBringingSexyBack**: love ur username :D haha and thank you SO much for being the first to review... made me smile.

Thanks,

**Mrs.Hermione J. Weasley: **ur too kind. And thanks again for reviewing.

Thanks,

**Oh.My.Lullaby**: Yes… I was about to continue it but I decided not to. I thought it would be a very good opening. And I guess it was… but enough of my conceitedness… Thanks!

Thanks,

**Mrs. Quincy:** Uhhmmm… interesting. Not too sure what that means but thank you for reviewing. ;D

Now, even thought most of you didn't review, that's ok… because…!

I still love you all!

Until next chapter!

Amanda out-

(AKA: Misery666 out-)


	3. One More Time

AN: 3rd chapter now! I'm so happy! Hehe. Yes… I'm scaring myself again. :D

Disclaimer: I'm kinda glad I don't own anything. Because it just wouldn't be the same.

Chapter Three

One More Time

Waking up is never easy, especially when you know you're going to die today. But instead of falling into a blissful black abyss, I'm going to fall into Edward Cullen's arms.

Precisely where I am right now.

"Good morning Bella." Looking up, I saw Edward's seraphic face twisted into a doleful expression. I frowned.

"What's wrong Edward? Is everything ok?" I met his eyes and saw they were a brighter topaz color than usual. '_It must be the extra hunting's doing_'

I watched as he played with my hair; beginning to worry that something was very wrong, my eyes widened. Meeting my horrified expression, he hastily responded.

"Everything's fine my love." I looked at him curiously since he seemed hesitant to continue, "It's just… today you're giving up you're life… turning into a monster, just to be with me. It's not worth it." I gasped, and glared at him furiously. Staring back at me, he looked surprised at how angry I had gotten.

"Don't ever think that Edward Cullen." Putting an emphasis on every word, I sat up in our bed and continued to glare as tears began to well in my eyes, "You are worth everything to me. And I'm not giving up my life, I'm starting a new one… with you." Angry tears fell freely down my cheeks. With my head in my hands, I wept.

Crestfallen at how angry he had made me, Edward embraced me immediately. Stroking my hair and rubbing my back, my sobs calmed.

"I'm sorry Bella my sweet. I didn't mean to make you cry, especially this early. I truly am a monster." He chuckled softly against my ear, making me shiver with delight. Wiping the stray tears from my face, I hugged his cold body tighter to mine.

"You may be a monster. But you're _my_ monster." Tittering, we broke from the embrace and he smiled.

"And you're soon to be mine." He tensed for a moment, and then sent me a dazzling smile, which did its job by making me woozy, "Hungry?" He held a hand out to me, and I happily took it feeling his smooth cold skin. Instantly forgetting about the whole thing.

"Very." He pulled me up from the bed and we walked downstairs to the one of many kitchens with his arm around my waist. Clinging to him we walked in sync, only, I made the most noise.

In the kitchen, we found Esme had already made me some pancakes, along with eggs, beacon and a cup of orange juice. Esme looked up and smiled.

"Good morning Bella. I made you breakfast. Sit. Eat." She motioned to the chair in front of the delicious food and I obliged.

"Thank you Esme." Cheerfully eating my breakfast Edward watched me, and once in a while would talk to Esme about something that I wasn't really paying attention to.

"How is it?" I looked up at Esme, with my mouth full. Trying to at least get one word out, I nodded and smiled. Bracing for the pain it would cause me, I swallowed hard and took a breath.

"It's delicious Esme, thank you." Esme laughed and took a seat across from me.

"You're welcome. I'm just glad it tastes good. I was worried that it would be horrible." I chuckled and continued eating. Suddenly I felt a breeze then a second later I felt another breeze. I glanced at Edward and saw that he was reading the paper. Realizing he was the one who caused the breeze, I continued to eat.

Full to the brim, I leaned back into my seat and took a deep breath. '_Will I miss food or what?_' I smiled, content about everything.

My smile vanished as I thought about Charlie and Renée. It was so hard saying goodbye to them. Knowing that I wouldn't be able to see them again for a year almost made me cry again. But it was for the best.

I'd rather spend a year away from my parents than risk their lives by being selfish and visit them in the state I'll be in.

Getting a mental picture of me drinking the blood of my parents, I quivered. '_At least I'll be able to talk to them on the phone. That's better than nothing._' I felt a soft smile grace my countenance.

Reminiscing about that day Charlie tried to have that sex talk with me, I sighed. Even though he only got a few sentences in, that still got me blushing like crazy. Nothing could ever make me blush as much when Renée gave me the sex talk. I think I blushed for an entire week. There were no words for how embarrassed I was. I snickered silently thinking about that.

After breakfast Edward and I decided to take a walk outside. Wearing my warmest clothes, I walked beside him in the snow.

It was silent while we walked. Other than a few whistles from the wind, it was fairly quiet. Even though it wasn't necessary, Edward wore a jacket as well except it wasn't as thick as mine.

Not really paying attention to where I was walking, I bumped into a stone hard body nearly falling over. But a pair of strong arms caught me and propped me upright.

Gazing up at Edward, I laughed uneasily. Making yet another human mistake, but that could just be my bad luck rising up again. Not like it ever went away though.

"Bella… are you sure you want to do this?" Edward gazed deep in my eyes, as I gazed back. His arms confined me closer to him.

I know what he wants me to say, but that's not what _I_ want. I want to be with him forever. Why hasn't he gotten that into his head?

Staring at him, I readied myself for the pain I would feel in my chest, thinking back to when Edward left me. I could feel myself ripping apart inside as my breath became shallow.

"Do you want to be with me?" Desperately trying to blink the tears back from once they came, I focused on trying to ease my tattered heart. Edward glared hard at me; surprised at my question.

"Of course I want to be with you, I love you." He pulled me closer to him in his arms. I softened my glare, and looked into his eyes. I must have looked pain stricken because Edward softened the intensity of his glare too, and the embrace.

"Just not forever." His expression hardened. I could feel him begging for me to understand. I know what he was trying to say to me, and I'm pretty sure he knows what I'm saying, it's just he's not giving in so easily.

"Bella, you know that I don't have a soul. I just don't want you to share the same fate as I do." Gazing at him through the bitter wind, his ivory skin contrasted with the snow wonderfully. The wind died down a bit as snow gently fell into his bronze hair. His bright yellow eyes stared me down. But I couldn't look away; I was too awed. Could this boy be any more beautiful? '_Yes'_ I inwardly chuckled at that thought. It _is_ true.

Waiting for my reply, he grazed my cheek with his fingers. Almost shivering from his frosting touch, I stared at him… dazed by his beauty.

Before I forgot about what we were talking about, I closed my eyes in focus. While trying to remember what I was going to say, I swear I heard him laugh softly.

Finally being able to remember, I stared past his ridiculously handsome features, into his bright gold eyes.

"You know I don't believe that Edward. I _know_ you have a soul. I believe you all have souls, and so will I." Holding me close, I put my head under his chin, "Trust me." Even with him cold as ice, I felt warm.

"Okay." Snuggling myself closer to him, I grinned in realization and pulled back to see his surprised expression.

"I can't believe it," I laughed uncontrollably. Edward just stared at me like I was crazy, "I won!" Completely puzzled, Edward raised an eyebrow.

"You won what?" Too giddy to even stand still, I jumped up and down in glee.

"I won the argument!" Edward just smiled and shook his head in disbelief. I was too happy to calm down. Even in the cold, I was completely relished.

"You cease to amaze me." Smiling his crooked smile, I grinned like a love struck fan girl. Feeling the bone chilling wind, I shivered and not in a good way. Edward saw this and pulled me closer to his stone-like body.

"Come on… let's go inside." I nodded as my teeth chattered. We walked back through the snow and the wind. Finally seeing the warm and cozy house of Tanya I was awed once again.

Long slender windows with white frames, thick stone bricks piled one after the other, a spacious chimney, and finally, a large thick oak door. I'd have to say that this is the best house I've been to. Even though it's going to be the last house I'll be in while I'm human, it wont be the last house I'll be in for the rest of my existence.

Even though I was here for two weeks, I never really took the time to examine its features. But with 15 bedrooms, 12 bathrooms, 3 kitchens, 3 living rooms, 3 dinning rooms and other ridiculous rooms designed for nothing in particular… it's kinda hard to look around outside when you're anticipating the tour inside. All in all, it was a beautiful house.

Busting the door open to meet a gush of heated air, I smiled feeling content.

Walking up to our bedroom, I opened the door. Throwing my jacket on a vacant chair, I sighed.

3 hours is how much longer I have left of being human. But in 3 days, I'll be part of the coven.

I wasn't feeling scared or anxious. I was at peace. I'm not sure if I should be feeling this, but I was.

I sat on the bed with Edward close by me. With both our jackets and shoes off, I laid down on the bed and brought him with me. Resting my head on his well-toned chest, I smiled.

Swiftly but subtle, Edward was above me again, dazzling me with his invigorating scent. Biting my lip in a teasing way, I shifted under him putting him between my legs.

Smirking, he brought his lips down to mine. Holding him in place with my legs as I wrapped them around him, my fingers lost themselves in his hair.

Each touch was accentuated with electricity burning through my skin. I knew that if I didn't stop, every vampire would hear what we were doing. But… his lips… his touch… all too desirable to stop. He was dazzling me again.

Before I lost all train of thought, I removed my lips from his.

Obviously that didn't work since he kissed from my jaw line to my neck. Pausing for a minute to savor the smell of the 'bouquet', I nearly lost consciousness.

Even though we had done this many times, each time still felt like the first.

Feeling his icy touch on my hip and behind my neck, I felt helpless. I couldn't stop him; he was too desirable, and determined.

A moan escaped my lips. I couldn't help myself, I tried to keep it in but from everything that I was feeling, I couldn't stop it.

Releasing his cool breath near my ear, my heart rate increased immensely. Getting a positive reaction from me, he grinned.

Bringing his lips down onto mine once again, I tried to talk, muffled by the kiss.

"…Wait. Wait… Edward stop." He groaned but didn't stop. '_I'm going to murder this boy…_' I grimaced. Why must he have this effect on me? I moaned again against his lips, making him smirk. I inwardly groaned.

Everything I was thinking was suddenly whisked away. Trying to remember what I was going to do, I gave in to this sublime moment.

His hand trailed from my abdomen under my shirt. Knowing his intentions, I immediately remembered the vampires downstairs. If they _could_ blush, I'm pretty sure they would now… that is, if they can hear us. Which is most likely a definite yes.

With him relaxed at my touch, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't know what happened to him until I actually do it. Taking a deep breath from my nose, I hastily turned over putting him under me and grabbed his wrists. Bunching them together, I put them over his head.

A compromising position he had put me in many times. Finally getting revenge, I smirked gratifyingly.

Meeting his surprised expression, I rolled my eyes and laughed half-heartedly. Mostly likely amazed at my actions, he laughed too. My breaths shuddered as my heart pounded inside my chest. Face flushed, my hands still shook from the intensity of the make out session.

"…Edward, I can't do _this_ when everyone is downstairs. I mean… they'll hear us." Beet red was how I saw myself through his eyes. He merely chuckled.

"If you weren't so loud…" He accused. My face burned a bright red, inhaling sharply and mouth agape, I gasped.

He laughed even louder, "I'm just kidding Bella. Breathe." I didn't even notice I hadn't inhaled or exhaled for a few minutes. Taking a deep breath, I looked at him sternly as he took on a serious look.

Easily unwrapping himself from my feeble restraints, he took my face in his hands. Relaxing at his touch, I stared deep into his bright gold eyes.

"Bella, you're going to be one of us and I've accepted that. But you aren't going to be human again," He slightly frowned, but then recovered with a sincere smile, letting his hands brush against my cheeks, I inhaled his extravagant aroma, "Just, one more time… I want to kiss you. One more time, I want to caress your soft hair. One more time, I want to feel the heat emit from your body before it turns cold. One more time… I want to make love to you, just… one more time. Before you aren't human anymore." Almost feeling those tears fall down my cheeks, I watched him. Not being able to believe that this boy is mine... for all eternity.

This time, I pressed my lips to his. One more time, I let myself lose all self-control… and this time, I didn't hold back.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Yay! Chapter 3! Up and running! Wow. That was a lot of editing there. And omg! And again thanks so much for the reviews and everything!

I swear… I love you all to death! Even the non-reviewers. :D who read my story. Haha.

Well here's another personal thanks from me to those whom reviewed. :D

Thanks,

**like a vampire xx:** well thanks. I'm glad you like it. I hope you liked this chapter too. Yeah I know… believe me, I'm trying to type more.

Thanks,

**Edward'sBringingSexyBack:** Yet again for reviewing. I now dub you as a loyal fan. :D well… I can't let it all out so… you'll see soon. :D

Thanks,

**29Isabella:** Hehe… hold on just a little bit more, it's coming up. :D

Thanks,

**Sakura-Girl 2005:** well thank you. Just one day I was sitting in my bed and then eureka! A new story. Haha. So believe me, its only interesting because of hard work. And English in school. Haha. And hopefully I will, depends on how fast I write.

Thank you bye-bye!

Till next chapter!

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	4. Time Is Running Out

AN: Yay! Another chapter… so sorry it took quite awhile! Some stuff just came up. Ok enough… enjoy! That's what you came here for. :D

Disclaimer: I think that's all to be said… Oh! I don't own the song 'Time Is Running Out' by Muse. I'm glad I don't too… its too great to be owned by me. ;D I don't own the band Muse either… damn.

Chapter Four

Time Is Running Out

30 minutes is all I have left of being human.

And to tell you the truth.

I can't wait.

I even think that Edward was anticipating it a little bit, but I think he was more anxious. But even with him so tense, I could tell he was doing his best to keep me happy.

Although… I'm pretty sure the last 2 hours has loosened him up a little bit.

Instantly blushing, I hid my face under the covers.

Cradling me in his arms he pulled me closer to his icy body, cooling my heated face from his touch. Sighing in content, I smiled.

His body suddenly went rigid; I knew he was thinking about what was to happen in 30 minutes. I couldn't help but be frustrated. I understood why he didn't want to turn me, but even after he said he accepted my decision, he still acted the same way.

I was hoping that he was eager too. But of course, being eager was the last emotion he could feel right now. Damning me to a life of desiring blood for every second I exist is exactly something he doesn't want to do… and to me of all people.

In my opinion, he was being selfish by trying to repress me from something that I want, for his conscience and I guess… my well-being. But, if it meant being with him; I would do it in a heartbeat.

But I think _I_ was being the selfish one by asking him to be the one to change me. But he's the only one I would want to change me. Everyone else is fine, but it's _Edward_ though. The love of my life… and soon to be existence.

My heart and soul.

He must understand why I want him to be the one to change me. I want his venom inside my body. Despite the unbearable pain, I would undergo the transformation everyday if I had to, just to be with him.

Resting his cheek on my forehead, I could feel a smile grace his features.

I rolled my eyes out of annoyance. I swear he has more mood swings than I do.

How I wish I could read his mind. But, it is very plausible that if I _could_, I would be completely overwhelmed from how much he thought… I'd probably faint in one hour.

Gradually, his body relaxed against mine. I relaxed also as he breathed in slowly, in and out.

I felt limp next to him. Like I had taken a drug that took away any strain in my muscles.

Thinking back to the last 2 hours that were drenched in complete rapture, I smirked to myself. I underestimated how much control Edward really has. I know it takes a lot of effort for him to 'resist the wine', but he makes it look so easy. It pains me to know how much effort it really takes him to resist drinking my blood.

It's a burden he must endure everyday.

But finally today, he would be free from that burden. So he wouldn't hesitate with every move or touch. He could just go with the flow, and not have to worry about hurting me.

I do admit that it's hard for me too: cautious with how I move or position myself around him. I'm not cautious every time I'm around him; it's more like when I want to get closer to him.

Intimate I guess.

It doesn't matter whether I'm cautious or not though… I always lose control when it comes to that.

But even with the troubles of being a human, I know it's going to take much more will power being a vampire. Mostly the newborns stage no doubt.

Looking past Edward at the clock, I noticed that I have 28 minutes left.

Wondering what everyone else was doing I relaxed my head into the fluffy pillows again. Most likely, they were prepping things for the upcoming metamorphosis.

I'm not completely sure about any of the preparations that Carlisle and Edward had in mind, but the only thing I am certain about is that Edward is the one to change me. Feeling a bit of guilt wash over me, I frowned a little bit.

As if Edward could read my mind, he spoke, "It's alright Bella. I am fully aware that I am entitled to the job of changing you by your request. I oblige only because _you_ want me to. If it were any other way, I would still respect your wishes," Thankful for having such a perceptive husband, I let go of a breath I've been holding for a few minutes, "Now, Esme has made dinner for you. You should go and eat. For the last time." Feeling his jaw clench as he spoke the last part of his sentence bitterly, I moved to stare into his luminous golden eyes.

For a fleeting moment, I pressed my lips against his. Ravishing the moment, I pulled away quickly to see him smile softly. There was no need for words.

In fact, I didn't want to speak. Incase he might try and talk me out of the entire thing… you never know.

Crawling out of bed reluctantly I took my time. Grabbing a set of clean clothes, I headed towards the bathroom to take a very quick shower.

Since I did in fact _just_ have sex, a shower was needed. I cringed slightly, suddenly feeling very dirty.

Not physically dirty, just mentally.

Especially with my in-laws right downstairs the whole time, a shower was desperately needed and fast.

Quickly and efficiently I showered and dressed. Opening the door to reveal Edward dressed as well, I noticed he had taken a shower too. A much faster shower than I could ever pull together.

The golden eyes that stared so intently into my own mesmerized me to no end. With his hair slightly damp and his bright blazing yellow eyes looking me up and down, I fought the urge to tear his clothes off again… and mine.

I snapped out of it and chuckled inwardly. Smiling uneasily, I suddenly felt 'dirty' again.

Generously holding out a hand to me, I happily took it and we both headed downstairs.

Before I could take the last step at the bottom of the main staircase, I was suddenly engulfed in big brawny arms.

Recognizing these arms instantly, I hugged back still holding Edward's hand.

Bewildered at Emmett's sudden action of warmth, I glanced at Edward. Happiness was etched in Edward's expression. I guessed he was smiling from Emmett's thoughts.

"You know, you're really starting to grow on me." Pulling back from the embrace, Emmett put his burly hands on my bony shoulders. It's times like these that I wished I had at least _some_ muscles.

"I've missed you these past two weeks. Especially your clumsiness." A broad grin covered his face. Fighting back the tears, I spoke.

"I've missed you too Emmett." He growled playfully, making me grin instantly. If I weren't so used to it, I probably would've ran away out of fear.

Letting go of my shoulders, he was gone in a flash but quickly reappeared in front of me again.

Wagging a finger at me, he smirked, "By the way, you are so lucky I decided to hug you. Especially since… you know." Quirking an eyebrow at me, I stood puzzled.

Glancing at Edward I saw that he was staring at the floor, avoiding Emmett's smug gaze. '_Is he embarrassed?_' Finally putting two and two together, I blushed a vibrant crimson red.

It was pretty obvious. Everyone heard.

Bringing my hand up to hide my ridiculously red face, I spluttered to get coherent words out, but failed immensely.

Emmett gave a hardy laugh, at both Edward and I.

"What ever we do is _our_ business Emmett." I glanced to the side and saw Edward gazing sternly at Emmett's sly expression. Emmett's grin widened.

"It _becomes_ our business when we hear it. Especially when it was as loud as it was." I gaped with wide eyes. Yes… this is _the_ most embarrassing thing that has happened to me. Seeing that Emmett was going to say something, I cut him off quickly.

"Okay! We get it!" Squeaking out every word, Emmett scrunched his eyes from my high pitch squeals. Calming down my voice to make it sound normal, I continued with an emphasis, "We were loud-_I_ was loud." Correcting myself before Emmett could, I blushed even more.

"Yeah… uhm ok." Feeling very uncomfortable and awkward, I grabbed Edward's hand and bolted away from this humiliating conversation, leaving Emmett to stare after us with a strange smirk.

There were no words to describe how embarrassed I was. I was so completely inarticulate; I couldn't even look at Edward, let alone hold his hand.

Before I even knew what happened, I was in Edward's arms and I was breathing heavily. Finally realizing I'd been hyperventilating, Edward's calm velvet voice soothed my ears and evened my breathing.

"Calm down Bella… breathe slowly. I'm sorry Emmett did that. He was just being facetious, which was a little over the top for Emmett. He really didn't mean to make you upset." Obviously very worried, Edward held me tighter as he caressed my back. For some reason, it seemed like Edward had something more to say, but since he didn't continue, I guessed it was something about Emmett's thoughts that made him not want to continue.

"I know that he was just joking but… It's really hard for me to talk about that sort of thing. I just got a little too embarrassed. I'm fine, really I am. It's just… I didn't expect him to be so blunt about it, and I guess I kind of freaked out." I pulled back to make sure he understood that I was just too embarrassed for my own good, and saw worry plastered into his features.

"Kind of?" Clearly he was a little too worried. Looking to the side I read a clock that said I have 17 minutes left. Noticing this he took my shoulders reassuringly.

"Bella… are you sure you want to do this? It seems as if you're afraid to go through with it. You don't have to you know? All this anxiety is clearly something bigger than just being embarrassed. You don't have to go through with any of this if you don't want to." If I could, I would seriously slap him. But if I did, it would probably result in a broken hand.

Evidently, he still doesn't understand. But in that instant, I knew exactly what to say to make him see that this is what I truly want.

"Edward. My love for you is endless. And that's how I want it… endless." If Edward had said this to me, I would be bawling happy tears. However, Edward had taken this exceptionally well though, not very emotional but more straightforward.

He paused for a moment, almost hesitant, but then swiftly his gelid lips came in contact with mine. Bewildered by this abrupt kiss, it took me a moment to figure out what was happening.

His hands whisked through my hair as he began to dazzle me once again. I wasn't even sure if I was breathing, not like I cared.

Constricting my arms around his neck, I followed his lead. I wasn't even sure where we were, but from what I could see there was a grand oak table, but the rest I couldn't see because the only lamp emitting light was the one in the hall.

Obviously we were in one of the dinning rooms. Thank god it was vacant, if Esme and the others were here… then I would really be embarrassed.

Taking in the ecstasy of the moment I relished his sweet scent. I'm not completely sure how I _am_ able to take in his intoxicating scent since I wasn't even sure if I was breathing, but decided not to think about it.

Delirious from Edwards every touch and his exhilarating taste, I felt my knees buckle under me. Edward noticed this and lifted me from the floor.

His icy granite skin against my own made me shiver with euphoria. Then abruptly I plopped down on something cold and hard. Since Edward was in front of me, I knew it was the grand table.

Positioning himself between my legs, he gave me a break by kissing down to the nape of my neck. With my pulse out of control and my breathing erratic, this was not a break. It was cruel.

A normal person wouldn't want a vampire anywhere near where he was, but I want _My_ vampire as close as physics will let me.

This erotic moment began to be too much, but I knew I could not make any sounds this time. We were too close to everyone else. I mean, if they could hear us right now, then at least don't make it seem too obvious about what we're doing.

Leaning over me on the table, he moved his cool lips to mine once again. Feeling a cold hand bring my leg to his hip, I felt him slowly move his hand back down to my hip.

I could already feel how much he wanted me right now; flushed with excitement, I fought for control. With all this feeling consuming me, I'm not sure how much longer I could contain it.

I could not do this right now; I would not allow this to happen again. With the momentum building up, I knew I had to stop this before we end up doing it right here. On a table. In the dark.

It was pretty ironic because, it seemed like I was the only one in control… sort of.

I was amazed to hear his breathing erratic too. Except my breathing sounded like I was in pain. Trying so hard to keep _it_ in, it sounded like a throaty whimper.

All I need is just a little while longer. Just long enough for me to stop, before somebody walks in on us.

Unfortunately… I was too late.

Abruptly, Edward stopped. Finally getting what I wanted, I found that I really didn't want to stop. I saw Edward turn his head to the left. I followed his gaze and saw a silhouette of Alice standing in the doorway, and my jaw dropped. '_How… embarrassing…_'

"I have taken it into account that you two are newlyweds and all but could you tune it down just a little bit?" Even with her face in shadows, I knew she was smirking.

With great reluctance, Edward crawled off of me and helped me down from the table. I wasn't sure but I swear I heard him grumble as we made our way over to her.

"Unfortunately, I had a vision of this incident. I am very surprised at you Edward. With you having so much control, you really don't when it comes to Bella." Lately it seemed everyone was picking on Edward, and I was the one blushing _for_ him.

Alice's smirk then dropped to a frown, "I'm sorry Bella but we all have to hunt again. Carlisle will stay with you while you eat though." For a swift moment, I saw Alice's eyes flicker to Edward then back into my own.

I felt him tense beside me as his expression hardened. I could tell he was keeping something from me, and so was Alice.

I narrowed my eyes at both of them.

"We'll be in the common room when you're ready." Alice turned on her heel and briskly danced out of the doorway down the hall.

I took a quick glance at Edward and saw his tortured expression. With his perfect ivory features twisted into a sorrowful expression, my countenance fell as well.

I hesitated to ask, but he cut me off before I could get one word in, "Well, we should get going then Bella." Giving me that blank smile, I stared at him incredulously.

I could not believe he was just going to drop everything. Did Edward think I would let go of this that easily? He probably took that into account, and will do anything to avoid confrontation, but I have to find out what made him so tense. '_If only he could just hear this one thought, so he could see how much the suspense is killing me._' I almost growled with anger.

"Don't you dare Edward Cullen." Edward merely stared at me dumbfounded. I guessed that maybe I was doing something that shocked him. I wasn't holding a knife drenched in my own blood, and I was pretty sure my klutziness didn't put me in the middle of a death trap. What was wrong?

"Edward? What's wrong? What did I do?" It sounded like he laughed a little but began to smile and muffled his laughter.

Shaking his head while smiling, he spoke, "Nothing Bella my love, you've done nothing wrong… shall we?" I dropped my jaw in shock. Holding out a hand to me, he hypnotized me with his crooked smile.

I was completely bewildered by his actions. '_Has more mood swings than I do, I swear._' I huffed incredulously at him.

I felt so frustrated; I could have strangled him with my own bare hands.

Smiling at me, he seemed unfazed by my angry expression. He actually looked like he was about to laugh.

"Bella, I know you're angry with me right now. But please, I beg of you to leave it alone. I don't want to put any strain on you. I've already put too much on you as it is. Just trust me… you don't need anything else to worry about." A frown overtook my features. Watching him smile so warmly, I really felt awful.

"I'm sorry." He chuckled lightly.

"Don't be. I should be the one saying sorry… for everything I've put you through-" Silencing him by putting a finger up to his icy lips, I gave him a reprimanding look.

"All of that is in the past Edward. Look to the future." I smiled happily, and he returned the smile, "Like that thing that happened earlier, I'll be nice and ignore it for now. But, I want answers later." Staring deeply into my eyes, he nodded.

Feeling very pleased with myself, I glanced at the nearby clock and slightly panicked, but quickly recovered, "Well, we'd better get going. Ten minutes left. Alice did say that we _had_ to be on time." I was amazed to see him smile at that.

"I concur. Now finally, shall we madam?" Taking a step back he held his hand out to me once again. This time I took it and grinned.

"We shall good sir." Grinning together, we both walked out of the dark dinning room, down the hall into the common room. All eyes were on us, even before we walked in through the doorway.

"Time is running out Edward," Taking a step forward, Alice grinned happily, "We'd better hurry." Nodding to her in agreement, Alice walked out into the hall and out the door, the others followed suit but Edward stayed behind.

Carlisle sat smiling in his chair and cleared his throat.

"I'll wait for you in the kitchen Bella." Carlisle then stood up and swiftly walked out into the hall without a sound. Hoping that would be me soon, I shimmered with delight.

Turning towards me, Edward took my chin in his hand and brought my lips to his.

This was a very dangerous kiss. Much more need and passion was put more into it than any other kiss we've had, besides the ones where he was about to leave me. He would not do that again; he promised me. And I trust him not to do it again.

Feeling this kiss turn as if deadly, I quickly removed my lips from his. Taking a deep breath, my head spun. Edward hugged me close as he whispered into my ear.

"I'm sorry, I'll try and control myself better. Alice is right you know," His cool breath created goose bumps on my neck, as I struggled to keep breathing, "I really can't control myself when it comes to you. I suppose that's my only weakness… and strength." He chuckled lightly as his finger grazed my cheek in a circular motion.

"You're a very dangerous creature." He breathed into my neck and smirked. I stood frozen in my place, yet my body was shaking with ecstasy. My face flushed a light pink, just imagining how Carlisle is taking this.

Breaking the embrace, he pecked me on the cheek. Then, with that crooked smile plastered on his face he was gone. I shook my head absentmindedly and smiled happily.

I turned to my right and began to walk towards the doorway to the hall. Looking at my surroundings as I made my way down to the kitchen, I was awed once again. Long oak doorframes were lined up left and right leading to any and every room possible. Glass windows that were so clean, you'd think there weren't any windows at all.

Walking down to the far end of the hall, I turned left to the second to the last door and walked into the grand dinning room to see Carlisle sitting at the far end of the master table with my food next to him.

Sitting and eating next to my father in-law was more unnerving than talking to Alice about sex. Considering about what Edward and I have been doing, and what he's probably heard… it's unsettling.

"Bella, is something wrong?" At last I stared up into Carlisle's golden eyes, and smiled weakly. 

"What? No, nothings wrong. What makes you think that?" Over all, Carlisle seemed quite calm, but no one could deny that smile just itching to present itself.

"Well, if you say its nothing then I sincerely believe you, however with you're constant tapping, and your heart beating at an exemplary rate, I must assume that you're nervous, or along those lines." Feeling the pink flush wash over my face I smiled weakly.

"Are you nervous about your change? Its good to talk about these things, and its entirely understandable." Carlisle smiled with sincere while I blushed with mortification.

My hand shook as my face burned. I cannot talk about this with Carlisle, I couldn't. It's too much. He's too much of a father to me.

I watched my hand quiver next to my drink, and apparently so was Carlisle. My blush intensified.

"The magnificent blush on you're face is making me wonder if you're embarrassed about something," I really just wanted Carlisle to stop digging. If he finds out why I'm so embarrassed then my life is completely over, "Whatever you're embarrassed about Bella you can tell me. If I know my son, he would not appease this at all and grow skeptical." I shrank beside him. I knew that I had to tell him now. Even _if_ I'm about to croak from embarrassment, he was right… if I knew my husband at all, that is exactly how he'll react.

I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, while I stammered for the right words, "W-well… uh. Uhm?" It just wouldn't come out, but I _had_ to tell him, "Uh… yes I'm nervous about my change but not enough to back out. I'm just, it's just. Well, it's what you've heard recently." Carlisle stared at me strangely.

"I'm sorry but I don't think I follow." Even Carlisle, the smartest man I have ever known to exist next to Edward that is, even found me hard to understand. I guess I wasn't so blunt about it, but I threw a few hints. I think.

"Well uhm… more like what Edward and I have been doing?" Praying to god that he understood I reached out anyway possible with my mind. At that moment, all the blood in my body rushed to my face as Carlisle smiled in comprehension.

I could tell he didn't want to laugh in front of me, but to tell you the truth; I kind of did want to see him laugh. It would be the real first time I'd seen him truly laugh. Even so, the content smile was just as good. At least it made my blush go away.

"Ah. I understand why you're so embarrassed and I don't want to make it worse than it already is so I think I'll stop." If I weren't so attached to Edward, I think I would have drooled from Carlisle's heavenly smile. Inconspicuously, I wiped the edges of my mouth just to make sure I didn't.

Finishing up my last meal, I faced Carlisle with a genuine smile. He returned it gracefully.

"I promised Edward that I would give you a small dosage of morphine. I would give you a bigger dosage so you wouldn't feel the pain at all, but I myself am not sure what problems could arise in your transformation if I did so. All in all, I'll be giving you 3 injections today. The first one will just numb your skin, the second one will be a short lasting morphine so you're body can grow accustom to the drug, and the third one will be a long lasting morphine, it should cover up your pain very well, but you will still feel it, just not at the maximum amount," Understanding the procedure, I was happy that I at least got the 411, "And throughout you're transformation I'll be giving you injections of morphine when the first dosage wears off. Now, do you have any questions?" I let my eyes wander for a moment, thinking of a question to ask. Suddenly one popped up and my eyes flickered back to Carlisle.

"What room will I be in?" I knew this was a very strange question to ask, but I wanted to know. Carlisle eyed me curiously and I knew this was the last thing he thought I would ask. I bit my lip to muffle the chuckle that was erupting from my chest; luckily I succeeded. Although I think he noticed and smirked peculiarly.

"The same one you're in now. And Edward will be at your side the whole time. Any more questions?" Tapping my foot under the table, I tried to think of another question I wanted to ask. When one didn't come, I shook my head and he smiled softly.

Swiftly he glanced in the direction of the grand oak door then back to me, luckily I caught it in time to notice, "The others are heading back now, we should get you ready." I was a little confused at Carlisle's choice of words.

'_Get me ready? Do I have to change my clothes or something?_' Nonetheless, I watched Carlisle stand and walk into the hall. I followed him down the hall, up the stairs, and into the room Edward and I share.

Walking inside, I quirked an eyebrow. Nothing seemed different; everything looked the same. So what changes could Carlisle do to the room?

Carlisle motioned for me to lie down on the bed and I obliged. Laying myself on the king sized bed, I took a deep breath. I stared at the dome-like ceiling when I felt something wet on the crease of my left arm and smelled the strong scent of alcohol. Then I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my left arm. I turned to my left and saw Carlisle holding a needle as he punctured my skin.

I could already smell the salty iron like scent of my blood, immediately taking away the powerful whiff of alcohol, making my stomach lurch in every direction possible. Desperately trying to hold in my dinner I began to breath through my mouth.

Right then from my shoulder to the tip of my fingers, there was no feeling in them. Carlisle's stone cold hand suddenly disappeared, even though he was clearly still holding my arm.

"Do you feel the effects yet?" Taking my attention away from my arm, I stared into Carlisle's eyes and nodded. Holding up the needle, he put it aside on a tray and grabbed another syringe with a ridiculously long needle attached to it.

"This is why you needed the first one." I could feel my mouth grow agape as I stared at the preposterous needle. Carlisle then grabbed a clear bottle with liquid inside it.

Slowly the liquid was sucked into the needle, and then he gracefully pulled the needle out and flicked the needle twice getting out any air bubbles and squeezed the syringe lightly letting a small amount of the liquid to spurt from the needle.

I watched him closely as he brought the needle and punctured my skin once again. I felt nothing and watched as the liquid was pushed slowly into my arm. Taking deep breaths I watched Carlisle pull the long needle out of my arm and set it aside. Then he smiled happily at me with his hands in his lap.

"That's it?" I was completely amazed that this was all to be done. Even though I had a few more injections that I wasn't eager for, I was amazed at how simple it was.

"Yes, you're all done. At least until the first dosage wears off you'll be fine. And in a few seconds you should feel the second injection taking effect." Suddenly I felt a whoosh of peaceful bliss hit my body.

My head was clouded with happiness and complete euphoria. Everything seemed to be going in slow motion but I was still aware of what was going on.

"I like watching you be a doctor." I wasn't sure where this came from, but it just flowed from my mouth like a high drug addict. Carlisle smiled blithely.

"Well I'm glad you like watching me become my alter ego." Then I heard someone giggle profusely, since I saw Carlisle quirk an eyebrow, it must have been me.

"I'm here…" Abruptly I heard Edward's voice whisper in my ear, and I grinned finally complete.

"Edward you're back. How was hunting?" I watched Edward furrow his eyebrows at me, then look at Carlisle.

"I see you've already given her the morphine. Thank you." I looked towards the foot of the bed and saw everyone else here too. Only they all were pinching the bridge of their nose because I was still bleeding from my arm. Even though Carlisle had put a bandage on it, I was pretty sure they all could still smell it.

"Of course." I looked back at Carlisle as he gave me a delightful smile.

Bringing me in an embrace Edward hugged me close and whispered into my ear.

"Are you ready?" He breathed. Instantly I knew what I wanted before he bit into my flesh and pulled back to stare into his brilliant yellow eyes.

"I want my ring first." As dazed as I was, this is what I wanted the most. Creasing his eyebrows he looked down towards his pocket and pulled out my beautiful wedding ring.

"Are you sure?" Carefully placing it on my ring finger, I nodded.

"Yes." Feeling content, this was the most perfect moment ever. Even with me drugged up as much as I am. I was still coherent enough to love this moment.

Then unexpectedly Rosalie was right next to me on my left. I turned towards her slowly wondering why she was so close right now.

"Bella, I just wanted to say that even though I don't agree with you're decision I do accept and respect it. You're the only person who _could_ make Edward happy and vice versa. I understand why you want this so much and I do accept you as a sister, and a part of this family. I only apologize that I waited until now to say this." I could see the pleading expression on her celestial features. Through the thick fog in my head, I could see that she was serious and wanted me to accept her too.

The trance I was in began to overtake me, but before it could I smiled softly at her, "Thank you Rosalie. I really needed to hear that." Finally my time had come. Everyone left the room leaving Carlisle, Edward and I.

Holding me up effortlessly with his arms, Edward hugged me close once again. Grazing his lips against my neck, I whispered to him the last words I would say as a human:

"I love you…"

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Thanks again for all the reviews and everything. It just means too much! Haha.

I am SO sorry it took so long too. I really am. I meant to update earlier… I'm sorry:(

And oh my god I love this song 'Time Is Running Out'. It's so… so… delicious. And I think it fit the scene with Edward and Bella making out very well. Haha.

Btw… big Muse fan. Love them to death… went to a concert of theirs. Loved IT!

Amazing live… completely mind-blowing. :D

Any who, yet another personal thanks to my reviewers!

Thanks,

**Joanie1119:** Aw thank you. Haha. It was very enlightening… the words just flowed perfectly… it's a first. :D

Thanks,

**29Isabella:** Yeah, I've been mulling over things again and again. Mostly about her special gift that she should get. I've actually come up with something already… and to tell you the truth, I was actually thinking about having some ultimate amazing power like that of Charmed (yes… I've seen that show… haha… many times) and I thought that it was a little cheesy and too fictional. Not that the story itself is not fictional it just didn't seem to fit with the story. But any who, I have something in mind about her gift… and I hope that you like my idea of her power when she gets it. :D

Thanks,

**avidswimmer09:** I will:D thanks for reviewing.

Thanks,

**like a vampire xx:** haha nice. Well, I was about to put a lemon in here… but I decided not to. However, you never know if one will be there in the future… ;D

Thanks,

**Sakura-Girl 2005:** Oh thank you. I'm glad you liked it. Sorry I didn't fulfill the last part… but I'll try to do better in the future. :D

Thanks,

**Edward'sBringingSexyBack:** Oh well… thank you so much. :D It was actually very hard but easy to do Edwards little speech. Sounds like total bullshit but the words really did flow really nicely… haha. :D

Thanks,

**sg-1:** Thanks alot… hopefully my starting wont be the only good thing about my story. :D

Thanks,

**Callie Noelle:** Haha well… I tried my best… hopefully you liked this chapter. :D thanks for reviewing.

Thanks,

**crzybookluvrchick4017:** I know I know… I'll really try and get the next chapter out faster. And update soon. Thanks for reviewing!

Thank you all! Again! And I'm sorry! Again!

And by the way… since I took forever, I put two chapters together as an apology. I blended them together and I am sooo pleased at how well I did it. :D

Thank you again!

Peace!

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	5. Newborn

AN: Yay! Chapter 5! I hope you guys liked the last chapter. And now I hope you like this one even better. :D

Disclaimer: Yeah… that's right. I don't own Twilight or anything that Stephenie Meyers owns. What? WHAT? Haha and I don't own the song 'Newborn' by Muse. It's soo good… you should listen if you haven'tMuse fans. :D

P.s. This chapter was_so_ much fun to write! I couldn't stop… and I ended up putting two chapters in here… oh well… good for you… bad for me… sorta… haha enjoy.

Chapter Five

Newborn

I held Edward close as he stretched out his jaw, exposing his razor sharp teeth.

My eyelids drooped from the drugs; not capable of focusing, but fully aware of the situation, I touched the tip of my ring. Waiting as my fate came closing in.

Everything became a blur the instant Edward pierced through my skin as all the drugs were suddenly whisked out of my system. Feeling his jaw tense against my neck, it felt like he hesitated for a moment, then he gradually began to drink my blood.

It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would although I'd be lying if I said it was painless.

But for some strange reason, I felt free. Released from any restraints holding me down. I'm not sure why I suddenly felt this way; I suppose that's how all people feel when they die.

All the blood in my body began to circulate into my neck and out the open wound. Feeling my life practically draining away, my breaths turned raspy.

Gasping at how quickly the blood drained out of my fingers and toes, I relaxed my muscles and held the back of Edwards head, as if urging him to continue, when I really wanted him to stop. With my arms and legs lifeless, I just barely managed to stay conscious.

At last, I felt Edward remove his teeth from my neck and hold me close to his ice solid body. Letting my blood trickle down to my collarbone, my breathing softened.

Almost instantly, the venom began taking effect.

It raped through my veins like acid does to metal. Pushing forth through my body, it began to sting, like putting alcohol on a cut, but then it steadily grew worse with a searing pain.

Even though it was quite bearable, it still felt like a thousand tiny needles were set loose in my veins.

The searing pain pulsed in my neck. Pounding beneath my skin, I scrunched my eyes shut.

Slowly the venom made its way through my system. With every inch beginning to sting and burn I admittedly wanted it all to stop.

Although the narcotic was still in effect, it felt like it had already vanished. However, I was very thankful that I don't have to endure the maximum amount of pain like everyone else had.

Thinking that thought I suddenly felt weak. Like how I feel every time danger is around the corner. But with me, danger is near every time I take a step. And like the danger magnet I am, Edward and his family come through and protect me, risking their own lives.

Everyone I know has to risk their lives when they're around me. It's kind of funny to think that even vampires and werewolves have to be cautious around me.

Having a certain werewolf cross my mind, I immediately wished I hadn't thought of him. I do have to admit that he did take a big risk to be around me, next to Edward that is. Of course, Edward is always going to be the biggest risk taker.

Furrowing my eyebrows at my sudden change of thought, I leaned my head against Edwards's icy chest.

I'm not quite sure why I'm thinking all of this now, and especially confused why Jacob Black popped up into this. I suppose when you die, you just have to reflect on things in your life, especially if they're somebody who influenced you greatly.

Suddenly a wave of pain whisked through my body interrupting all my thoughts. Groaning out in agony I heard a smooth velvet voice whisper quietly to me. I instantly knew it was Edward; Taking care of me like always.

Gradually the agonizing pain ebbed away and I relaxed to his tender voice as a bearable pain coursed through my body.

My skin felt hot and sticky. I was glad Edward was as close to me as he was. Listening to his every breath, I concentrated on them. Though it wasn't helping my situation at all, I kept at it.

Once again another wave of pain hit me. Groaning out I pushed my head closer into Edward's chest, letting his cool skin come into contact with my heated face.

Slowly it went away again, and was replaced with bearable throbbing.

Scrunching my face, my breaths became heavy and shallow. Thrusting my hands out, I latched onto anything my hands came into contact with. Feeling a cool smooth object in my left fist, I thought it was part of a chair; I looked to my left only to find out it was Carlisle's hand.

It was then that I had a thought. What if I didn't want the third morphine injection? If everyone else had to endure the unbearable pain, why should I get the easy way out? What allows me to be able to get this type of treatment, when the others did not? I know that I would be deeply reprimanded by Edward if I decide to not take the third injection. Knowing him, he would probably give me the shot anyway.

No, this is _my_ decision. And my decision is to have a transformation like everyone else. No drugs, no sedatives, nothing.

Abruptly another wave hit. I tightened my grip on Edward's shirt; closing my eyes, I strived to keep my expression calm. Sighing as it passed, I felt the bearable pain steadily getting worse.

Quickly glancing at Carlisle I noticed he was beginning to prepare the third injection. It was now or never. If Edward really does respect my wishes, he'll let me have a say in this. Whether he likes it or not.

Striving to make myself be heard, I found that it was incredibly arduous to attempt to talk, let alone whisper. Every time I tried to speak, it sounded like a hoarse grunt.

For one fleeting moment, I glanced at Carlisle and saw he was holding the long lasting morphine shot just inches away from my arm, still letting me hold his hand, the shot drew nearer.

My eyes widened. I had to do something, _anything_. Anything that would show that I don't want it, so I could have a normal transformation like everyone else had.

I couldn't even think of what I was going to do, and before I realized what I had done, all I managed to see were two pairs of eyes staring strangely at my pained expression. Edward's body tensed next to me.

"Bella, stay still, we need to give you the-" Interrupting him I clutched my left arm closer to my chest, I whimpered no and shook my head. Finally noticing that I had pulled my arm out of the way at the last second, I let go of a breath.

"I know it hurts Bella but-." With all the effort in my body, I pushed out a grunt and hoped that it sounded like the word no. Snapping my eyes open, I reached out with pleading eyes, just hoping that Edward understood what I was desperately trying to say.

Compared to his sorrowful expression, the pain almost felt nonexistent. Nonetheless he understood. Feeling guilt wash over me I couldn't bear to look at him. Looking away from his doleful gaze, I felt a cool hand take my chin and I looked up as Edward smiled down at me like nothing ever happened.

Grunting out of extreme discomfort, I found I was overtaken by another wave. Under the amount of absolute torment I was feeling, I had no choice but to scrunch my eyes closed. Taking deep breathes, I desperately tried to open my eyes and succeeded.

Gazing up at Edward, I saw him nod towards Carlisle as he put the needle back onto the tray.

Watching this, I realized I had won yet another argument and couldn't help but smile.

Once again my happiness was subsided by another wave of pain, only this time it burned ten times worse than the others. Clutching the bed with my fingers, I closed my eyes shut, telling myself it would soon end. All the while, I did not scream but merely grunted quietly.

Arching my back reluctantly, I concentrated on keeping my breaths evened out.

Letting go of the bed sheets, I grasped Edward closer to me. Holding me tightly, I distinctly heard my lullaby being sung. Instantly my strained muscles relaxed to the sound of Edward's melodic voice.

Tuning in and out to my personal Euterpe, my breathing calmed.

For hours, this continued routinely. And each time, it ended all the same.

Inside Edward's arms, I found he was struggling too. As if trying to keep his control.

I couldn't think of any reason why this was, other than the wound in my neck; but Carlisle had already put a bandage on it.

Slowly breathing in and out, I discovered that I didn't have the strength to think at all. Every bone and muscle was drained of its will to move.

Becoming a newborn was definitely hard work.

Suddenly widening my eyes from a scorching wave, I realized it had been twenty-four hours since Edward had bitten me. '_Another forty-eight hours to go_' I thought absently.

In the last few hours, an unfamiliar feeling had taken over me. It wasn't a particular emotion, but more like a physical feeling. Breathing in and out felt unnecessary, as did straining my muscles in a way to drain out the pain.

But in all that physical torment, I reached an obvious conclusion. Whether I move or not, I would still feel that searing agony. So, instead of flailing around, I chose to not move at all. I also reached the same conclusion with screaming, even though I didn't feel the need to anyway. Although, there would be some grunts now and again.

From the beginning I never felt the need to scream out my guts from the amount of unbearable pain. It worried me that I wasn't screaming out loud since everyone else had, but soon I ignored that thought.

I wasn't sure how Edward or Carlisle was taking this either. I'm sure they assumed I would be screaming out in agony and extreme torment as well, and were probably very surprised when I didn't.

Now and then my body felt numb, as if the transformation had been completed, but then I would feel a searing pain course through my body proving my assumption wrong. I soon learned to deal with this irritating process, and let my thoughts consume me… whether I wanted them to or not.

During this time, I found that I thought about Jake the most and how horribly I left everything.

I know that I _cannot_ live without Edward and that I made the right choice, but I can't help the fact that I feel terrible guilt whenever I think about Jacob. His big broad smile seemed to always lift my spirits, especially when they were dead. And now I'll probably never see that smile ever again.

I can never forgive myself for doing that to him. For everything I put him through, there's nothing I could say to show him how sorry I am. There's no word to describe how horrible I feel.

I will never forget the day that Sam told me Jacob ran away. If I remember correctly it was the day before my wedding. Of course, I still went through with it… a typical coldhearted move from me.

In the end, I convinced myself that if Jacob really did love me, he would've attended my wedding and watched as Charlie gave me away and applaud as Edward and I said our 'I do's' and kissed as Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen. But nobody would make someone do that. Not even the most cold-hearted person in the world would do that to someone they call their friend.

I hate to admit that during my wedding day I completely forgot all about Jacob, and I always will feel deep remorse for that.

What the worst thing is though is I don't regret anything. I don't regret hurting him the way I have, or destroying his spirits. I know I should feel absolutely despicable, but I don't. So I make myself feel horrible, because I know I'm supposed to… but no matter what I do, I don't. That's why I can never forgive myself.

Bringing myself back into the present, I sighed. Staring into space, I heard a distant voice speaking. Noticing it was Edward's voice, I focused on it to listen what it said.

"…One more day Bella. Just one more day and it'll all be over." This came as a surprise to me. I guess I was so deep in thought that a day had passed already. Who knew that I could think that much to not even realize a day had passed?

It was incredible how fast these two days went by. I thought I would be writhing in complete torture forever. Only one more day to go. Is it supposed to go by that quick? I wondered if this is what Alice meant by 'going through smoothly'?

Suddenly I began heaving out grunts, as my heart pounded beneath my chest. Panicking, I wondered if another day had passed as well. '_is it time now?_' Slowing down then speeding up again, my heart rate was erratic.

It felt like something were about to happen. But the longer I waited, the more I thought it was just all in my head.

Tossing and turning, I felt Edward trying to keep me in his arms.

I was sure this was it. It must have been three days already; what else could be the cause of this?

Everything was happening all at once, I couldn't focus. With my vision blurred and my hearing hazy, I panicked. Nothing was clear; Feeling around for anything, I suddenly felt something hold me down.

I fought to get the weight off of me.

I wanted to get up, and I wanted whatever was holding me down to go away. I wanted to be in Edward's arms again, not pinned down like this. I struggled under the pressure, and the pounding in my chest wasn't making it any better.

A breath caught in my throat as time slowed down. My breaths became shorter and more spread apart as the pounding in my heart seemed nonexistent.

It was an amazing feeling. Everything that was worrying me suddenly vanished. The pain in my veins stopped, as did the beating of my heart.

Everything in my mind vanished. I tried to think of something that could help me understand what was happening, but I couldn't think of anything at all. Nothing came to mind, even when I was trying to think of my own name.

Suddenly not knowing where I was, or who I was, I drifted in this black abyss.

Abruptly, during this time the name Edward popped up. It sounded familiar, but I wasn't sure who this was or if I was affiliated with this person in any way.

Instantly, an image of a boy flashed before my lamented eyes. Observing the mental picture, I'd have to say that this was a very beautiful boy; Abnormally gorgeous really. With rare golden eyes, I couldn't help but shiver from his intense gaze. I wondered if this was Edward.

Furrowing my eyebrows, I thought hard. Now that I think about it, this boy seemed very familiar. Edward. '_Edward… Edward._' repeating his name inside my head, I desperately tried to remember where I've seen this boy.

'_Edward… Edward… Cullen?_' Edward Cullen? This was excruciatingly perplexing. Never expecting death to be like this, I began to doubt this thought. If I were dying, then… how do I know?

That is unless I'm not dying, it's just I feel like I _am _dying. Or… I knew I was going to die but also live; Like a near death experience. And this Edward Cullen must be the cause of it, but that doesn't explain why I remember only this and nothing else.

Keeping these thoughts at bay, I suddenly began to see past memories flash before my eyes and everything finally made sense. Edward Cullen, the man of my dreams had finally bitten me… and I am currently undergoing the transformation of becoming a Vampire.

Aware of everything that was going on, I immediately began to feel around for anything. Hoping that I was somewhere familiar.

Without a warning, a breath caught in my throat. I immediately stopped my searching and swiftly brought my hands up to my neck.

My throat felt so dry I thought it would effloresce once I took a breath. Then abruptly I felt anomalously thirsty for something. And as expected, that something would be blood.

Finally taking a breath, my body relaxed. I closed my eyes and relished the rare moment of peace.

Taking a deep breath, I felt a pair of familiar cold arms holding me tight.

I smiled.

Opening my eyes, I saw Edward staring down at me with a worried expression to match.

"You're awake." Too stunned to even move, Edward held me close to his body, "I was beginning to think you would never wake up. I apologize for my doubts." Hearing the distress in his tone, I sighed. Content that I was awake and for good.

Finally taking in my surroundings, I found we were outside in the clear Alaska night.

It was unbelievable. Even I couldn't fathom what I was feeling at the moment. I am at last a Vampire, just like the others… and Edward. Now, I would not be dead weight… now, I-

A burning sensation consumed my throat, cutting off all my thoughts. Widening my eyes, the burning intensified. Swiftly putting a hand up to my neck as if to distinguish the burning, I gazed up at Edward to meet his horrified expression.

Regaining his composure quickly, he stood up and brought me with him.

"The burning in your throat. It means that you're thirsty. Pretty soon, you'll be overwhelmed by your thirst, that's why we're out here." Even with my throat practically smoldering where I stood, I saw that Edward seemed so distant, like, he were looking at an entirely different person.

Looking at me as if I were a clone. I couldn't understand why he was acting like this, and the fire in my throat wasn't helping my predicament.

Hugging him close to my body, I gazed intently into his reddish eyes. I guessed that since he drank my blood three days ago, it made his eyes red instead of the usual gold.

Breathing in his customary scent, I was amazed that he still smelled this extravagant.

Swiftly but subtle, I pressed my lips to his. Deepening the kiss, I pressed with need and passion. Feeling him return it with as much gratitude as me, I sighed in complete rapture.

Breaking apart from the kiss, I pulled him in a tight embrace. Slightly dizzy, I was astounded that he had the same effect on me. I guess some things never change.

Pulling back I glared hard at him, "Edward…" raising an eyebrow, I heard an unfamiliar dulcet voice. Realizing it was me, I continued, "No matter what happens in the future, I don't ever want to see you look at me like that again." Looking down away from my gaze, his expression turned doleful.

"I'm sorry Bella. I was… afraid of how you would react. I'm sorry if I hurt you." Gazing up into his topaz eyes, I smiled reassuringly.

"It's fine Edward… I'm fine." Grinning, I bit my lip as my throat continued to burn, "Now, can we uhm, go now? I'm not sure how much longer I can stand it." Smiling softly, he nodded.

Intertwining our hands together we walked in the snow in silence. I made every effort to stay calm, but every step I took, I felt like running at light speed anywhere. Telling from how tense I was, Edward knew how much I was trying.

Every minute of starvation was painful. The back of my throat burned with every swallow, just itching to bite into something. But I knew that I couldn't just pounce at anything; I had to show Edward I was strong.

At that instant something struck me. A magnificent scent filled my nostrils, and it seemed Edward noticed the smell too. I froze in my place; still holding Edward's hand, I took in the delicious scent.

My body quivered as I struggled for control. Every ounce in my body told me to take off at full speed to the scent, but I couldn't… could I?

Closing my eyes, my whole body focused on the scent. It was the most delicious aroma to fill my senses, absolutely succulent.

Biting my lip as it trembled, I looked up at Edward. Surprisingly, he smiled.

"Go ahead. I'll be right behind you." Loosening my grip a little on Edward's hand, I hesitated to let go, knowing what would happen if I released his hand.

Then a thought struck me. If I did let go, what would I do? What would happen? Would I attack Edward? Would I hurt him? I could never forgive myself if I did something to him. Finally realizing how Edward felt when I was human, guilt flooded my emotions.

The delightful scent became stronger, making my efforts futile.

Glancing up at Edward a second time, I fought to make voice audible, "But… What do I do?" Smiling encouragingly, he let go of my hand and moved my stiff composure in front of him.

Staring straight ahead, he whispered in my ear, "Give in to your instincts. Just… let go." Listening to his velvet voice, I relaxed in his hold. Closing my eyes, I felt him let go of my shoulders. No longer feeling his cool breath on my neck, I opened my eyes to see everything passing in a blur. Leaving behind everything from trees to bushes I felt undeniably aerodynamic.

Adrenaline pulsated through my body. With my intent set and clear, I felt nothing could stop me.

Longing for the taste of that delicious scent, I could just imagine how fast my heart would be beating.

Feeling a snarl erupt from my chest, I pressed forward through the frost covered trees.

With every step I took, the scent became more and more desirable. Blood lust filled my mind…I had to have it; it was mine.

At last I arrived at my destination. Before me was a herd of caribou grazing. The largest of the herd, perked its head up and glanced around as if it had known I were there watching them as I planned my attack.

Positioning myself behind a bush, I readied myself for my strike. Immediately releasing an earsplitting snarl, I bared my razor sharp teeth and burst out of the bushes.

As I bolted toward the petrified herd, I spotted out a worthy target. Pushing forth, I noticed it had a baby next to it. I almost stopped if it weren't my deprived hunger forcing me forward toward the mother caribou.

Quickly, I spotted another reasonable target, and shifted all my primal instincts toward it. This time I didn't care if it was a mother or not, I was too close to give a damn.

Tackling it to the ground, it squealed out a call to the others. As if its squeal of despair were a gunshot, the herd instantly came to its senses and galloped away.

That's when I heard another squeal ahead.

Too preoccupied by my trapped meal, I ignored the other squeals and began to sniff at its delicious scent.

Pinning it down, it seemed I was pressing too hard on it and I softened my hold. Kicking and crying out, I stared deep into its eyes.

Moving my hands slowly to its neck, I could feel the blood rushing to its heart.

My fingers tingled with excitement.

Slowly bending down towards the frightened caribou, I thought about nothing but the taste of its blood inside my mouth.

For a fleeting moment, I took in the mouthwatering aroma then outstretched my jaw. Puncturing its flesh I bit down hard through the skin and fat as the blood poured freely from its wound.

Sucking in the unbelievably delicious blood, I savored its taste with every drop of blood. I was pushing down so hard, I didn't even realize I had broken a few of its ribs until it squealed out in agony.

It tasted better than I imagined, who knew me of all people would enjoy the taste of blood. Its warm crimson blood glided down my throat making it tingle with joy. Sucking in every last drop, I could almost feel myself smile.

No longer hearing its raspy breathing, its heart stopped as the kicking and squirming ceased. Finally coming to my senses, I stopped and pulled back.

Looking down at my kill, I was surprised I had made such a big wound. Wiping my mouth, I realized the caribou's blood had trailed down my chin and neck, and seeped into my white shirt.

Glancing around, I noticed that Edward was a yard away from me drinking from another caribou. I guessed that while I was drinking my fill, Edward was the one that caused the other squeals. But telling from its oddly shaped neck, he must have cracked its neck before quenching his thirst, letting it die a quick death.

Gazing down at my caribou, I suddenly felt a pang of guilt. He quickly killed his while I let my caribou's life fade away in a slow painful death.

Hearing some footsteps, I suddenly panicked. I looked up only to meet a pair of coral eyes gazing down at me.

"Don't worry Bella. We all forget what we are. That is until we have to hunt again." Staring up into his eyes, I glanced at the dead caribou then back to him, "But until then, let's remember who we are." Giving me a grand smile, I returned it the best I could.

"Now. There's a preserve a few miles away from here. The preserve sends out people to patrol the animals and protect them if so that live out here. We can't leave them anything to prove our existence so we have to bury them." I nodded and watched as he buried my caribou and his.

Standing up, we headed back in the direction of Tanya's mansion.

I couldn't stand the tension between us, and not only that, it felt strange to walk. I wasn't used to feeling so nimble and light on my feet and walking beside him made it even more awkward for me.

Practically hearing his distressed thoughts next to me. I knew he was beginning to think changing me was a mistake, and that I was sad because I regretted my choice. But that's not even close to the real reason.

Breaking the silence, I spoke to him in a low whisper, still audible to the vampire hearing, "I don't regret my decision Edward. I was just… scared." Feeling his burning gaze on me, I dared not look at him. I didn't want to see regret in his eyes.

I continued to make sure he didn't get the wrong idea "It took me off guard." Keeping my eyes off of him, I stared at the snow in front of me, "I… I let it suffer. Because… I wanted it to suffer. Watching it try and run away… I enjoyed it. That's what's bothering me. I guess I now know how it feels to be James." Uttering his name sent a shiver down my spine. Even though he was dead, he still haunted me.

Instantly I was pulled into an embrace. Tucking my head under his chin, I sighed into his shoulder.

"Listen. You're new at this; everybody has problems. Even I had trouble, and I still do. I will never let you become _him_. I promise." I hugged him lightly, not wanting to hurt him, "Overall, I on the other hand was actually very surprised." Creasing my eyebrows, I pulled back to gaze at him peculiarly.

"I've never seen a newborn take it's time. Usually, a newborn drinks all it can get and doesn't even bother to bask in its scent." Instantly, I felt like a blush was coming on, but no warmth heated my face. Finding this a little awkward I touched my cheeks feeling an unfamiliar smooth marble-like skin, instead of the flawed skin I was born with, I gasped. Stroking my new soft granite skin I smiled.

"Now I have skin like you." I bit my lip as he grazed his fingers against my cheek. Feeling his cool slender fingers against my granite skin, my breathing stopped.

Fixed in a trance, I took in his sweet aroma. Completely awed that this vampire was so indescribably dazzling that he could leave another vampire breathless.

"You're just as beautiful. And you smell exactly the same." Hearing him say that to me, it actually felt right to be called beautiful. In return, I smiled like a love struck nerd.

"Just not edible?" Immediately grinning, he looked thoughtful and nodded.

"Like a permanent perfume." Resting his head against mine, he smiled crookedly, "Nonetheless, you still sing to me." Lightly, his lips came in contact with my own.

Pressing forward, he wrapped his arms around my waist making me cling to him. I was lost in this passionate moment, instantly forgetting that I was stronger than him I clung tighter. Hearing him grunt surprised me. Opening my eyes, I saw he was trying to loosen my grip on him.

I swiftly removed my arms from him and stepped back with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry. Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry. Are you ok?" He merely laughed and stepped toward me.

"Why be gentle now I wonder? You didn't seem to care about my hand earlier." Remembering back to when I was struggling for control, my worry heightened.

"I'm so sorry. Is your hand ok? Does it hurt?" Holding his hand up, he chuckled as he flexed his fingers.

"Well, I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt at the time, but no… it's fine. It just twinges a bit." Looking at my worried expression, he laughed again.

"Don't worry so much my Bella, It's ok. We all had trouble with our strength. You'll get used to it. But, before we get back promise me one thing my love?" Watching him apprehensively I wasn't sure if I should agree so easily, but with him smiling that way, it was difficult to avoid the quick answer yes.

"And what would that be?" Growing more hesitant, he smirked.

"Challenge Emmett and Jasper to an arm wrestling match. Somebody needs to put them in their place. Besides… Emmett was going to challenge you anyway. Might as well beat him to it." Grinning, I laughed profusely.

"Yeah might as well." Taking my hand in his, we walked through the snow. Looking around at the trees blowing in the wind, I widened my eyes.

Finally realizing that I wasn't wearing a jacket, and blood was all over my white shirt I sighed. Alice probably saw a vision of this and bought new clothes for me. She also probably told Emmett and Jasper I smothered Edward by kissing him and that I hurt his hand.

Feeling a bit of guilt, my head slunk onto my shoulders. Edward noticed and put his arm around my shoulders, hugging me close to his defined body. Noticing something on my arms, I found that from my transformation, I received lean muscles. Feeling so content, I smiled.

Thinking back to when everyone said something before Edward bit me made nonexistent tears fall. Immediately thinking of Jasper a question rose.

"Edward, where was Jasper this whole time? I don't remember if he said anything to me before my change." Hearing him sigh, I knew he didn't want to say anything about it.

"Your emotions were too much for him. So he had to leave, just for a while. He should be back now. He didn't want to leave, but he had to. He promises to make it up to you." Looking up at him, I saw him smile.

"Oh… he doesn't have to." Keeping his gaze forward, he smirked.

"No matter what you say Bella, he's going to make it up to you one way or another." Pouting, he tightened his hold on me. I had to give in. Snuggling myself closer to him, I smiled softly.

"I'm not surprised that I still can't hear you're thoughts even with you being one of us. But, no matter how much I complain I am somewhat thankful I can't hear you. Even when it can be maddening." Smirking up at him, I quickly pecked him on the cheek. Only mildly surprising him, he smiled softly.

I wasn't surprised either that he couldn't hear me. Although, I was in some way hopeful that he could, but I am equally grateful that he can't.

Now that I really thought about it, I don't think I have any signs of having any unnatural gift myself. I obviously don't have mind reading powers because I can't hear Edward's thoughts. I'm not having any premonitions or anything, and I doubt I have any power like Jasper.

Thinking this through, I began to doubt that I attained any power at all. A frown covered my features.

"What's wrong Bella? Are you still thirsty?" This question took me off guard. Was I? I didn't feel thirsty in general, and the burning subsided, though I could still feel it faintly. So I guess I wasn't.

"No." I wasn't sure, but I swear I saw him stare at me strangely, but then he recovered and smiled happily.

"Then what's wrong? Are you sad about something?" Hearing this, it seemed I needed to elaborate. I hesitated a little, wondering if I should start this conversation.

"I was just wondering, when did you know you could hear people's thoughts?" I could tell this caught him off guard. Leaning my head against his shoulder while he thought, I sighed getting a little anxious.

"I believe it started a while after my change. I remember hearing faint voices. At first, I was beginning to think I was going mad. But when it was just Carlisle and I in a room together alone, it appeared I could hear his thoughts. When I informed him about it, I doubted whether I should or not. However, when I told him he was very calm and we tested my theory and I was right. After that day, I practiced and practiced to master it. It was very much the same with Alice too. Through her memories of it, I saw that she found out a few days after her change as well. Only, it was much harder for her to cope. Jasper also. We all found out a few days after our change. We don't know why this is, but Carlisle thinks its because our body needs to grow into it as if it's a natural process. In other words, like how a baby learns how to walk. Almost like it's second nature." Listening to his story, it gave me hope.

Hope that in a few days, I would attain my power as well. Suddenly feeling eager, I smiled softly. From the corner of my eye, I saw Edward gazing at me curiously.

"Why do you ask?" I knew he was going to ask this question, and responded nonchalant.

"Well, since I'm part of the coven now… I was wondering when I would get my special gift. I thought that I would get it as soon as I awoke, but from what you said, I guess I have to wait. But for a minute, I almost doubted I would get anything at all." Feeling his crooked smile behind me, I rolled my eyes, "I now see that it was very foolish of me to think that." Slightly irritated at his concurring smirk, I stuck out my tongue at him. He laughed.

Finally seeing the beautiful mansion, I grinned with glee. Not being able to wait I bolted forward at vampire speed toward my new coven, leaving Edward behind to chase after me.

Passing everything in a blur, I laughed as Edward ran purposefully slow behind me. Feeling so content, there was nothing that could ruin this phenomenal moment.

That's when I smelled it. A strong awful musky scent that charred my senses; I wrinkled my nose. I was bewildered by the scent, nonetheless, I still ran at vampire speed towards the mansion.

Seeing that it was the only scent and reaction I thought I had left in Forks forever, I instantly knew who it was.

Startled by the sudden realization, my foot caught onto a rock sending me forward to fall flat on my face. Landing with a thud, I looked up and I was immediately shocked at what I saw.

Seeing a silhouette of the last person I thought I would see, I gasped.

I couldn't believe my own eyes… let alone my ears as he spoke, "Bella?"

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Ohhh! Yes… I left you on yet another cliffy. Haha sorry. I had to. Haha

And I do apologize because I don't believe this was my strongest chapter. It failed in the beginning I think but the middle was nice… then the end was just.. ulghhh! Haha

So all in all, this in my eyes was not my best work. But it was funn to write:)

Anyways… as usual my personal thanks you whom reviewed. :D

Thanks,

**crzybookluvrchick4017**: well I'm glad you share my love for Muse. :D thanks for reviewing first. :D I hope you liked this chapter!

Thanks,

**Krystina the Alien**: Well, for the most part, it was relatively good. You gave a lot of detail in your story and it was very enjoyable to read. :D thanks for the compliment. And thank you for reviewing. :D ah! See… you get two smilies… haha :D oh… no three. :D oh four!

Thanks,

**Sakura-Girl 2005**: Well thank you. I hope you liked this chapter as well. Thanks for reviewing.

Thanks,

**screaming the profanity xo**: I actually didn't know that there was a song of Papa Roach's called 'Time Is Running Out' until I looked it up on ProjectPlaylist. Haha. That's always good to know. And I do like both songs. But I'd have to say I love Muse more. Haha. Well thank you… I'm glad I write well. I'm actually very self-conscious and nearly suffering from OCD. Haha. I don't even know how many times I constantly check the editing. I practically know all my chapters by heart. Haha. Thanks for the review. Hope you like this chapter too. :D

Thanks,

**innocentdemon02**: Oh I know right! Haha. Pshh… no matter what story, Edward… will always be hott! Lol. Thanks for the review… hope you liked this chapter.

Thanks,

**Ametiste-lover**: Oh thank you so much. Yes well… soon, we will reveal her awesome amazing yet not too fictional power. I will soon… Authors promise:D And I am SO sorry I took forever updating. Haha I know I take forever. But I _have_ to make sure it's perfect or I wont update it until it's right. So yeah… if I take forever, you'll know why… haha thanks for reviewing. Hoped you loved this chap as well. :D

Thanks,

**Mrs. Isabella Cullen**: Haha I know… and I have another cliffhanger for you. For that, I am sorry. Haha. Thanks for the review, hope you liked this chapter too:D

Thanks,

**blood-drip-lips**: Thanks a lot. And thanks for reviewing as well. Most people don't review and its kinda annoying but… you learn to deal with it. But I've learned to praise the ones who have… haha. Cuz I like it when people do that for me. Haha. And I really hope you liked this chapter too… thanks a lot.

Thank you all _once again_!

You guys are so good to me. Haha

Still love you all!

Well… I guess I'll see you next time then.

Toodles!

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	6. For The Better

AN: Chapter six! Was it tough waiting for this chap? Haha. Sorry for making you suffer, I do enjoy depriving someone of something. :) I have to admit. :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or anything affiliated with Stephenie Meyers. I wish I did but I'm glad I don't.

Ps. Wow… did not mean for it to be this long. Haha.

Chapter Six

For The Better…

"Bella?" His voice echoed through my head.

His features imprinted into my memory as soon as I caught sight of him.

Watching his expression flicker to shock, concern, then anger. I froze in my place.

Seeing Jacob Black in the flesh…

It shocked me to the point where I doubted whether I really do see him, or if it's just my mind playing cruel tricks on me.

Nobody made any sudden movements. Behind me, I could feel that Edward didn't want to do anything that might set Jacob off and stayed motionless as a statue.

Jacob was the first to move. Taking a step toward me as I lay perfectly still in the snow, his hands began to shake… quickly glancing at my blood soaked shirt, his shocked face jumbled into sheer anger.

"What did you do to her?" He growled. His eyes flickered angrily from mine to Edward's.

Hearing faint footsteps behind me, I guessed Edward was making his way toward me. Immediately Jacob came closer to me, his eyes full of hate directed straight at Edward.

"You've done enough to her! Get away!" Jacob reached for my arm and grabbed hold. His hand scorched my arm. Feeling all the heat from his grasp, it burned my frigid skin.

I hissed at his touch and released a snarl. Letting it rip from my chest, I got on all fours and bared my teeth… ready to pounce and destroy. My teeth just inches away from his face.

Shocked at my actions, Jacob fell backwards and immediately let go of my arm. Watching his incredulous expression, I came to my senses.

My eyes widened in shock at what I had just done and fell back onto my knees. I felt absolutely horrible, and I bet my expression told him worse. My breathing stopped.

"I-I… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to… Your touch burned me. I'm sorry." My arms and body quivered. I could not believe that I growled at him. I felt completely ashamed that I had almost attacked a friend.

At last, Edward was by my side. Kneeling as he held me in his arms, I realized I _would_ have been hyperventilating by now.

Slowly, Jacob stood up on his feet. Utterly disgusted at both of us.

"How could you do this to us? To everyone! Your dad, your mom, your friends… to me… How could you?" His words cut deep into my silent heart. Then strangely, I felt a surge of anger pour through me.

"I didn't do this to anybody! I did it to me! I told you I wanted this… What are you even doing here?" I couldn't help the anger as it pulsated through my body. Standing up on my feet, I advanced on Jacob, out of Edward's comforting embrace.

Almost immediately I felt the dry burning sensation in the back of my throat again, longing for the taste of a frail caribou's blood to saturate my thirst. My anger intensified.

Jacob's body began to tremble. I instantly noticed that he seemed to be extra careful not to phase into his wolf form. Taking deep breaths, he glared and spoke through clenched teeth.

"I know… that's why I came here. I was going to stop it if I could. Obviously I am too late… You're one of them now. A filthy backstabbing leech!" Hearing his words, the shame I once had toward myself instantly converted into pure anger.

"You're one to talk about backstabbing!" I spat taking a step toward him making him flinch. Clearly remembering my motorcycle that he tattle tailed to Charlie, I felt a rumble in my throat and did the best I could to keep it in. No amount of apologizing would ever let me forgive him for that, or forget.

With his face etched in anger, and regret… he huffed.

"You really are one of them." This didn't hurt as much as I thought it would, and I continued to glare, "You wait. This isn't the last time you see me. Remember what I said bloodsucker." –suddenly diverting his anger to Edward- "You broke the treaty… I will return, but with the pack." I couldn't believe this was he… Jacob: The one I felt deep remorse for. And he was threatening to kill off my new family.

I'm not sure about Edward. But I will not let anything _more_ happen to them.

"Jacob Black… will you get a grip!" This surprised him, as did Edward behind me, "You do realize that if you do that, they'll kill me also? Jacob look. I know you hate me right now… and believe me; I hate you right now too. But this _is_ me. I am still Bella. The same Bella that you took care of… when I really had nothing to live for. The same Bella that accepted you for who you are, not what you are. And now… you're going to murder my family and me just because of what we are? You're such a hypocrite Jacob. I'm still the same Bella… just a little different. Now I accepted you, please… do the same for me." I was surprised at how my anger subsided. But I could still feel the irritating yearn for blood deep in the back of my throat.

Jacob stood, contemplating on what I had said. Telling from his expression, he was confused at what he should do. With his hands no longer shaking, he stood completely lost in his thoughts.

Feeling a hand on my arm, I didn't have to guess at who it was. Edward stood by me, holding my hand with a blank expression. Most likely listening to every thought in Jacob's mind.

"Please realize Jacob. If you were to attack my family and I… I'm sure everyone else would feel obligated to attack. But I could not bring myself to hurt you. I would never be able to hurt you. I've done too much to you to allow that." Instantly, the hurt and comfort overcame his expression.

"…Bella… I…" His words faltered, but even so, I knew exactly what he was trying to say. A sense of relief washed over my emotions.

"Its ok Jacob." Finishing with a soft smile on my lips, he glanced up at me, then quickly looked away. From the corner of my eye, I saw Edward begin to scowl. I could tell that whatever Jacob was thinking, Edward did not like it.

"Jacob?" Taking his attention away from the ground, he looked up into my pleading expression and softened his glare. My heart sunk at the look I received from him. Glancing at Edward I noticed his scowl had diminished. My relief instantly replaced with anxiety.

That's when I knew it. Jacob… my best friend finally had enough. My chest tightened as I waited for the inevitable.

"I'm sorry but… you are not Bella. You may speak like her… and act like her… but you're not her. I know she's somewhere out there; waiting to be found… saved. If it's the last thing I do I promise to find her." My expression fell as his eyes turned angry. But through his anger, I could the see the real Jacob inside his eyes, desperately pleading for him to stop, "I won't bother with you anymore. Any of you. I only wonder what Charlie would think of you now." His words stung. My best friend… I couldn't stand it; it was too much. Did he… really hate me?

Stepping forward, I snarled at him in a sudden burst of fury.

"Jacob… you're dead to me." He stared at me like my words had killed him; I once again felt the shock consume me. I didn't mean to say that… it just came out. Wishing I could take my words back as soon I spoke them, I waited for the tears to fall.

"You've been dead to me…" Widening his eyes in shock, it seemed he was surprised at his words more than I was.

For once I was speechless. My spasmodic anger had vanished, as did my hunger, leaving my body with a surreal empty feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Suddenly he turned away from me, making me think he wished he could take his words back too.

For one fleeting moment, I heard my voice speak his name in a silent whisper as if it were my last desperate plea to show him I cared. He hesitated, but then broke out into a full force run.

Watching him run away from me, it took every ounce in my body to not take off after him. Phasing as he ran… I heard a faint howl of anguish in the wind.

And then… he was gone.

Gone forever maybe. Never to be seen or heard from again, at least not from me. In spite of that, I would be lying if I said I didn't hope to see him again.

For what seemed like hours, I stood there still as a stone. As if waiting for Jacob to turn around and to smile that broad smile. The true smile I probably wont see ever again in my existence and hug me and accept me and my new family. If only that were possible.

Feeling a pair of hands on my shoulders, I took deep shaky breaths and did my best to regain my composure. I failed immensely.

It was strange how I felt: whole but empty.

I had lost my best friend… but I was ok with it. I knew this was going to happen. I knew that Jacob wouldn't be able to cope with me being his enemy now. I just kind of wished that somehow, we could've still been friends. How stupid I was to think that.

"I-… I am truly sorry." Hearing the regret in his tone, I waited to feel the warm salty tears to drip down my cheeks… but they never came. I sighed.

"Its fine Edward. It was bound to happen… its better for the both of us that it happened now." Hearing my now musical voice drenched in despair, his fingers tensed on my shoulders.

Swiftly turning around, I pulled him into a soft embrace.

Then looking up into his coral eyes, I did something he never expected me to do so soon. I smiled softly.

"Don't be so down. It's not your fault, besides…" Leaning closer to him, he seemed surprised at my actions, almost afraid, "It's for the better." Pressing my lips lightly on his it seemed we both were deprived of air for a moment and pulled away relaxed at each other's touch and continued our walk to the mansion.

Wrapping his arms around my waist as we walked in sync, he absently shook his head to himself on my shoulder.

"Even so, I apologize. I should have foreseen this. I did see you fall from one of Alice's visions, but we both didn't even register what could be the cause of it. We simply thought it was just you being Bella. My silly, clumsy Bella… but we were wrong… _I_ was wrong. How foolish of me to think you could still be my clumsy Bella." Thinking back to the day Edward laughed out of nowhere during our argument, I grimaced.

"So _that_ was why you started laughing." He frowned.

"I should've known." Hearing him scold himself, I began to become irritated. I didn't want to hear him blame himself… I wouldn't be able to stand it.

"Edward." I spoke in a warning tone. Suddenly feeling my thirst rising again, I sighed and ignored it for the time being; I felt too emotionally exhausted to hunt.

"Yes… I'm sorry. I'll be on my best behavior, I promise." Leaning my head to the side against his I smiled weakly to myself and closed my eyes, making sure I kept my feet forward.

Then, somehow my feet became entangled with his, and we both ended up falling over in the snow. Looking at Edward's amazed expression, I smiled sheepishly.

"I take that back. You still are my clumsy Bella." Smiling sincerely to me, I tried to lighten the mood, more like my own mood, and I narrowed my eyes playfully at him.

"Shut up. I am trying okay?" He smiled crookedly, taking my breath away.

"_That_ I am sure of." I rolled my eyes at his mockery and snuggled myself closer into his warm body.

This took me by surprise.

Not a second ago, he was cold to the touch. But now warm? I brought his palm to my cheek, and I noticed his hand was warm too. Moving my hands to his arms, then his face, I realized he was no longer that icy brick wall.

If I didn't know any better, I'd think he felt like a normal human being.

"You're warm." I whispered. Catching him off guard, he gazed at me curiously.

"Yes… as are you." Leaning forward until our foreheads touched, he smiled softly.

"Then you know what that means." He smirked and went along with my little charade.

"I was wrong about you turning cold." He breathed onto my face, sounding playfully annoyed, "You Bella Cullen, warm my very soul." Putting an emphasis on 'soul', I found myself smiling, as if grateful he said that. I felt that I would be crying if I could.

Dusting ourselves off, we slowly resumed our walk towards the mansion. Taking a deep breath, I suddenly felt anxious about meeting my new coven.

I wasn't sure why I was nervous. I imagined this over and over, so why am I nervous? I guessed it was because the last time I saw them, I was human.

My face probably told Edward what I was feeling and he hugged me tighter for encouragement as the mansion drew nearer.

A foot away from the glorious oak door, I paused. I didn't hear voices, but I heard shuffling footsteps coming in my direction. It felt unnatural to hear footsteps, _especially_ from my family.

Before I could get one more step, I saw Alice burst through the door and grin from ear to ear as she soared through the air toward me. I admit I was a little startled. But I was more afraid that everybody would be scared at how I would feel being one of them and keep their distance. Excited by her reaction, I smiled.

No longer a blur to me, I braced for the impact of a tackle hug. Right before impact, Edward shifted to my right and smiled as I was tackled to the ground. Strangely, I didn't feel a thing and hit the ice ground silently.

"Bella! I can't believe it. I'm so happy! I knew-" Stopping in mid-sentence, she wrinkled her nose and stared at me curiously, "You smell like a… dog." My smile faded.

"Yeah." Her eyes flickered from me to Edward, noticing my voice falter. Hoping that she would ignore it, I immediately recovered with the best sincere smile I could muster, "We'll fill you in later." Having a confused look flash across her face, she then instantly grinned.

"Ok. Oh don't worry I had a vision about your shirt so Rosalie and I bought you new clothes and don't get mad but we threw out most of your old clothes we also got you some shoes and other things I don't think I should mention here and we also redecorated your bedroom while you were away and…" Completely overwhelmed by how much this little vampire could talk, my mind went haywire. I even think Edward didn't catch half of the stuff she said. Although my hearing was heightened beyond comprehension, I still couldn't understand. Most of her words seemed like they overlapped each other.

"Alice?" Interrupting her never-ending conversation, she grinned.

"…And then som-Yes?" She shook with joy as I smiled sheepishly.

"Do you think I could get up now?" Insanely giggling she nodded, her grin never making the slightest change.

I'd have to say… seeing Alice so keyed up frightened me. I have seen her act like this before… But I've never seen her _this_ excited.

It made me happy.

Walking into one hug after another, it seemed they were squeezing me with all their might.

Seeing everyone relax, as if all the restrictions and rules were suddenly lifted off their shoulders, it was fascinating to see my real family. The only person who still had their guard up was Rosalie. Instead of hugging, she just sent me a slight nod and a halfhearted smile.

Edward did tell me not to mind her, but I couldn't help but think she were mad at me. I could think of a few reasons why but I guess I kind of hoped she could treat me like everybody else. I suppose, it'll just take time.

I guessed that talk we had before was a one-time thing, even though I only vaguely remember it.

Looking around at my coven, I realized Jasper was yet again nowhere to be found. At once I felt frustrated… '_Where is that boy?_'

Bringing my attention back to the gathering in front of me, I smiled nervously. I wasn't quite used to all the attention. I never was a big fan of gloating… especially when I deserved it.

Finally receiving a big asphyxiating hug from Emmett, he put me down and smirked. My breathing didn't make the slightest change. However, if I were still human, that hug would obviously be my last.

"Welcome back Bella I sure did miss you." Suddenly ruffling my hair with a noogie, I grimaced at my now messy hair. I narrowed my eyes at him as he barked with laughter. Patting my hair down, it was strange how soft and smooth it felt, especially how inconceivably straight it was and how easy it was to untangle the knots. I suppressed a gasp the best I could.

Abruptly feeling two hands pull me aside, I met Edward's glare, thankfully, it wasn't directed towards me but straight at Emmett. I chuckled darkly under my breath.

All the chatter around me was lightening.

I found Carlisle smiling and laughing, as well as Alice and Emmett joking around about certain things, Esme looking more beautiful than ever; laughing with the others, even Rosalie smiled a few times. And Edward.

He was the happiest I'd ever seen him, not to mention the most gorgeous. No longer tense next to me, I noticed nobody seemed tense; at last lifted from the burden of resisting my blood… they all looked impeccably and irrationally human; it was strange to feel that I truly belonged in this family. All my dreams had come true.

"Bella." Suddenly turning to my left where my name had been spoken, I saw Jasper standing in the doorway. I guess I was so preoccupied with everyone, I didn't realize he'd been standing there.

Ignoring the tenacious question of how exactly long he _had_ been standing there, I couldn't help but notice that everyone else had stopped chatting.

Bewildered by his sudden appearance, it took a moment for me to respond, "… Y-yes?" I didn't know why I stuttered, but it earned me a heartfelt smirk from him. I melted. I clearly still need to get use to everyone's sui generis allure. Suddenly embarrassed, it felt like I was blushing and scoffed at that thought. He grinned, so did Edward. I grimaced.

"I am so sorry that I haven't been here. I wish I could have stayed, but it was a bit overwhelming." I could tell he was truly sorry, I immediately accepted.

"You don't have to apologize Jasper. I understand." His expression turned grave, but then swiftly shifted into absolute euphoria. I creased my eyebrows together in confusion.

"I know… but I still feel bad… So I decided to get you a little gift, as an apology for my absence." Instantly, I became wary. But… he did say little, how bad could it be? '_bad_' I answered subconsciously. Before I could attempt to object, he quickly cut me off.

"I was forewarned Bella… I'm giving this to you one way or another." Nobody could deny the annoyance in his voice; everyone smirked including Rosalie. I glowered; swiftly giving Edward an antagonistic glare I noticed it.

Right away I could see that slight up curve on Edward's lips. A slight up curve that told me he was the mastermind. I immediately became frantic; Jasper raised an eyebrow and smirked smugly. Of course he could feel my hectic leeriness radiating from me.

He waited. I wasn't sure what was going on, so I waited too. Quivering in fear silently.

"Well… come here." Opening his arms wide in a welcoming hug, I was instantly baffled by his actions. Nothing was making sense. '_Is this a joke?_' I thought bemusedly.

"Uh… Oh!" Startled by his spur of the moment hug, I stood up from the couch away from Edwards's protective hold, automatically feeling the uncomfortable spotlight on me again. This family was clearly going to drive me insane.

I knew something was up. I know I had missed something in Jasper's voice. Something told me he was exceptionally excited about something, and if Edward was the one who helped him with an idea of a gift for me… maybe he was just eager for my reaction maybe it wasn't over the top. It could just be Alice's impeccable happiness flooding his also and I'm just reading too much into this.

I couldn't be sure, and walked cautiously into Jasper's embrace. He had a strong, comforting hold. Encircling his arms around me, he held tight. I only realized then that this was the actual first time I had been this close to him. I suppose since he was the most recent one to join this glamorous family, he had to be extra cautious around me.

I returned his hug, grateful that I could finally share comfort with him. I was glad I couldn't cry anymore… this would definitely be embarrassing.

Very swiftly, I felt him twirl me around. Putting his hand in front of my eyes as a blindfold.

"Now… don't peek. And don't trip." He chuckled. I scoffed and lightly nudged my elbow into the side of his stomach jokingly. Hoping I didn't put too much force in it.

I could feel his calming powers working their magic on me as he guided me to an unknown location. This made me think this 'little' gift was an understatement. He was lucky he blocked every emotion out besides serenity. I would have been hyperventilating by now.

Tapping my finger impatiently against my leg… it seemed even his tranquil waves weren't helping much. I anxiously waited for his gift. The suspense was literally killing me… I just wanted to get it over with already.

Although, much to my amazement, even Jaspers guidance wasn't helping as I wobbled from side to side. I wanted to slow down a bit but he kept pushing forward, having to catch me from time to time. In spite of me being a vampire now, I could see that I would be the only one lacking elegance in this family. I internally pouted.

Tripping over the floorboard and corners of doorframes, he finally let out an exasperated sigh. I grimaced menacingly. I could hear the chuckles from our family behind us.

Now my pouting was visible.

I immediately stopped, making Jasper bump into me trying to push me; my feet were firm.

"Ok… I am this close to turning this around. Keep laughing and see what happens." I threatened. The chuckles stopped, however, I could still hear Jasper grunting to move me forward. I almost laughed myself. As soon as I was satisfied, I resumed walking to wherever Jasper was leading me.

Still tripping profusely, I heard silent snickers behind me but I knew they were from Emmett. Of course he couldn't help himself.

It seemed like we were walking forever. Walking in circle's maybe. Maybe I'm just nervous and it's really been 3 minutes when it feels like 3 hours. Hopefully.

"Ok… ready?" A breath caught in my throat. It took a while for me to realize we stopped walking. Shaking my head to coherently think, I became unbearably wary.

"This is as ready as I'll ever be." I sighed. I bit my lip, trying to stifle my anxious whimpers.

"Alright." He chuckled, swiftly I could no longer feel his smooth warm hand over my closed eyes, "Do you like it?" He asked eagerly. Cautiously opening my eyes, my mouth instantly dropped at what I found.

Before me was a black very shiny, very intimidating, and also very expensive looking car with a red ribbon wrapped around it with a bow on top. I was speechless. Yes… 'little' was a very big understatement.

My body froze with shock. Although I knew what I probably looked like, I still couldn't regain my composure. For some reason, my muscles couldn't find themselves. And my face was stuck in that mouth agape, face shaped into absolute shock, with eyes wide open look.

"Do you like it?" He asked again. My mind was working too slowly to comprehend what was happening. I stammered, my voice breaking as I fought for it to sound audible.

"Y… y-you… bought me… a…a car?" I blinked to clear my head. My world was spinning before my eyes. My breathing turned husky as voices screamed inside my head erupting a headache at once.

Instantly I could feel every emotion I felt throughout my entire life pouring through me overwhelming my senses as distorted images flashed before my eyes clouding my already crowded mind… I was sure I was going to faint.

Everything was unclear. I couldn't tell if I were standing anymore, or if I had fallen but I knew someone had grabbed me, but I wasn't sure if someone was yelling or whispering or talking to me.

Searching for Jaspers voice through the muddle of voices screeching inside my head, I attempted to calm my breathing.

"Are you ok? It's just a car Bella. Calm down." Telling from his voice, he wasn't overreacting like how Edward would have been. Then, for some reason I felt a surge of glum and crestfallen emotions consume my well-being.

"I knew she wouldn't like it." Everything stopped at once. The voices ceased, as well as the images and my spasmodic emotions. It was like as soon as I focused on his voice, everything cleared.

"Whoa… Bella are you alright?" Focusing my eyes, I saw Emmett standing over me with a worried expression with his onyx eyes wide in disbelief.

Taking a deep breath, I found all the Cullens standing over me in fright. Edwards's expression horrific as he held me in his arms.

A bright light flashed in my right eye, blinding it for a moment before I realized it was Carlisle's alter ego taking over.

I was pretty sure what happened, but when I thought back to it, it seemed I knew less about it each time until I couldn't remember anything at all.

Finally bringing myself back into the present, I groaned as my brain pounded beneath my skull.

"What happen?" I grumbled while I rubbed my temples. Everyone stared at me in awe; Carlisle's face the most appalled. Alice was the first to speak.

"Well… you fainted." Disbelief coated her voice as doubt rang through my mind. I have fainted quite a few times in my past, and from what I could remember from those memories, it was nothing compared to what I felt a few seconds ago.

No… I did not faint. It was something quite different.

"Bella are you ok?" Quickly nodding to Edward's frantic voice, he sighed in relief. Pushing myself up, I stood up only to stagger for a moment and fall back into Edwards's arms.

Scrunching my eyes, as the throbbing in my head grew painful, I waited for it to diminish then I gradually stood up again. This time, Edward did not let go of me.

Everyone watched me apprehensively while I massaged my right temple. Shaking my head from the strange pain, I finally noticed the stares my family was giving me.

I raised an eyebrow, "What?" I murmured. A bit afraid of their answer. '_Is something wrong with me?_' I thought, utterly confused why they're all looking at me strange.

"You just fainted." Emmett pointed out bluntly as if his brain hadn't completely conceived what just happened. I narrowed my eyes at this obvious statement. I paused, waiting for him to continue why this was so appalling. He understood and continued in amazement.

"Nobody's ever fainted before… no vampire has." Feeling the strange pounding in my head suddenly disappear, I at last understood what he meant.

"Well jeez if you don't like it _that _much I'm pretty sure Jasper can take it back." Or so I thought.

My eyes swiftly made its way to Jasper in time to see his disconsolate expression. It hurt me to see him like this. I sighed and smiled the best I could, ignoring the strange stares.

Walking up to Jasper out of Edwards's hovering, I lightly hugged him. Meeting his surprised expression, I grinned happily, but for some reason, I felt a bit strange… like I was forgetting something.

"It's fine Jasper. I love it, I really do. You just startled me. And I didn't wasn't expecting it. You know how I am with presents and surprises. But I really do love it. Thank you." Instantly his downcast expression lifted into an unequivocal smile. Of course he knew I was trying.

"Your welcome. It's a 2007 Audi TT coupé. I know to you it's a bit much, but I really wanted to get you something. And since you need a car yourself, I thought it was a good idea to get it for you." I was amazed that he was _apologizing_ for getting _me_ a gift. Now I really felt horrible.

"No no… I really do like it. You don't have to apologize, really. It was a good idea; I mean… it is a good idea. Thank you. I love it." Smiling in return, I felt a nice whoosh of air fill my lungs. I only realized then that I wasn't breathing for a while. No wonder I felt a bit strange.

"Now if you'll excuse me." I began still stunned by his 'little' gift and my incident; "I'm going to go have a heart attack now." Emmett's booming laugh filled the garage, causing others to laugh as well.

Edward was by my side in half a second, still cautious while I began to stagger back to our room.

"Wait!" Jasper called behind us. Smirking at my stupefied expression, he pulled out car keys from his pocket and placed them into Edwards's outstretched hand. I was still too shocked to move, "You might want those. Its ok Bella… you'll learn to like it." Returning the smile, he turned and walked back to Alice. Indeed… I will learn.

Walking back to our room was harder than I thought. My feet were so light; it felt like I wasn't walking at all… almost floating. I felt like I was dancing but in a slow graceful way, especially with Edward by my side. It was too weird.

Even with me tripping now and then, it seemed my clumsiness was fluid, almost water like, except instead of tripping over air, my foot always found something to catch onto. '_Like that's really an improvement_'. I rolled my eyes at that thought. In my case, it is.

Stopping on the last step at the stop of the staircase, I sighed. I tripped on every step and Edward caught me each time, laughing. I pouted silently, although I think he could see it. His hovering subsided… thankfully.

"What's wrong Bella? Does my laughter bother you?" It took quite a bit of effort to keep myself from complaining like a five year old, and cleared my mind from those trivial thoughts. My throat burned once again, my stomach feeling hollow.

"Everything but." Looking down at the wooden floor, I realized I had yet to change my bloody shirt. His hold on me turned limp.

"I don't understand. I thought this was what you wanted?" Heartbreak and remorse covered his tone. I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes at him.

"Edward. This _is_ what I wanted. I am happy that I'm one of you now. Its just," I could tell he looked down on the word 'happy', like it were a lie and I hesitated to continue. His hold grew stone-like, "I feel like I'm still human. I may be a vampire, but I lack the beauty and elegance that you all possess." He frowned. Closing his eyes while he shook his head in disapproval, I waited for him to try and prove me wrong.

Opening his eyes, I found myself staring into his mesmerizing coral irises, "Have you even seen yourself yet?" My eyebrows furrowed. He smiled, "How can you make such an inane distinction about yourself, when you haven't even looked in the mirror?" '_point taken_' I thought, and sighed.

"Come." He began, "Let me show you that you are the complete opposite of what you think." Quickly, he led me into our room and pulled me into the bathroom.

I stopped dead in my tracks.

The person looking back at me was the most beautiful person I'd ever seen. Only then did my breathing pick up, when I realized that the beautiful stranger was I. My hair was impeccably straight and shiny; I had to touch it to see if it were real. Soft and smooth under my fingers like it was in the living room, I almost had to convince myself that this was me.

My pale face glimmered in the light; my cheekbones more defined as well as my jaw line and chin. Even with deep purple rings around my eyes, I was gorgeous.

My eyes were the only things that threw me off. My once brown chocolate irises now deep crimson. I knew this was to be expected, but this was something you could not take lightly.

Roaming over my now defined curvy figure, I felt like my beauty even matched Rosalie's. I internally blushed and shoved that thought away.

"See." Reading my expression, I looked back at Edward through the mirror as he smiled wholeheartedly, "Just imagine what the first day of school would be like now?" He chuckled as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I leaned into his embrace, and smiled, feeling like I could cry. Quickly dismissing the thought of first appearances at school before it could ruin the moment.

He growled playfully next to my ear. I laughed and growled back.

Moving to our bed, I laid next to him as he played with my hair. Probably enjoying my floral scent without having the urge to bite me. My smiled faltered thinking of that as Jacob came unwillingly into my mind.

Edward shifted both of us, so we were both lying on our sides staring at each other with our faces just inches apart. His dazzling scent tampering with my already troubled mind, not to mention his angelic features.

"Do you miss him?" I instantly snapped out of my hypnotic state, and gazed at him, mystified. He must have been scrutinizing my expression to figure that out.

In return, I gave him an honest answer, "Yes." He looked away from my gaze in thought as I continued, "But I already made my choice. He tried to change it by coming here. I don't think he understood that my answer is definite." Meeting my gaze, he hesitated to speak.

"…If he did make it in time. If he arrived here and managed to catch us before I changed you, would you still have gone through with it?" I thought about that for a minute, even though I already knew the answer. I responded, feeling like the most horrible person in the world again.

"Yes, I would have. Jacob or no Jacob… I would still pick you over everything." I guessed that _if_ I were still human, this would anger him but since I'm not anymore, since I'm bound to him forever, there was nothing to become angry about.

Watching him think about my answer, it seemed he was feeling pity for Jacob. Considering what happened, that was understandable.

"And being the selfish creature I am, this is full proof that I picked you over everything." He mocked darkly, "I do admit that Jacob's predicament would be unbearable for me, but instead, I would accept your decision because I love you. I would stay away from you. I would watch you marry someone else, even if it hurt, even if it killed me inside, because I love you.

"I'm not denying Jacob's love for you, I am only saying that if I were in his position it would only be that much more painful for me because I _would_ accept it. The reason why Jacob is in so much pain is because he can't accept it. Even knowing your decision is final; he continues to ignore that fact.

"I've seen what this does to you so let me be clear about this Bella. The sorrow or regret you are feeling towards Jacob because of what you have done is not your fault. He is hurting _himself_ by not accepting. He is hurting _you_ by not accepting. It infuriates me to know he is the cause of your desolation. And I infuriate myself because I cannot do anything to stop the pain you are feeling.

"The only thing I can do is tell you, you have done nothing wrong. You made a choice, even when you strived to have both. Jacob is still young and doesn't know how to accept the inevitable, but when he does I just only hope it will stop your pain. Your suffering… Just know that whatever happens, don't blame yourself. You start to blame yourself, then this life will not be easy for you. I would know." Smiling, he kissed me on my cheek. Thinking about what he said, I knew it was all true.

I did have to stop blaming myself for everything I had done to Jacob. Even if it does hurt him. The only way for it all to stop is if Jacob does accept it, although I know it would not be easy for him. I know it would be unbearable for me if Edward found someone else.

Actually, it _was_ hard for me to accept. Yet, in someway I did, only it felt like I was dead inside, still… I _had_ accepted and the pain did stop as long as I just kept moving forward. But I couldn't help but think of the past, knowing that it would hurt me, I kept those memories close, but ended up pushing them away deep into my heart, and tried to wait until they wouldn't sting anymore. That is until he came back to me.

Even so…

I do understand how hard it is. Edward knows how hard it is. Now, I suppose it's Jacob's turn.

"Hey, come on Bella. Lets see how strong you really are!" Interrupting my thoughts, I heard Emmett call from the living room from my sensitive hearing. I nearly laughed.

Looking at Edward, I smiled and grabbed his hand. Pulling him up from the bed, I watched his bewildered expression and laughed.

"Aw come on Edward. I want everyone to watch me cream Emmett in an arm wrestling match. Even you." Probably surprised at my many mood swings, he grinned and picked up the pace.

It was true. Thinking of Jacob and everything as I practically jumped down the flight of stairs, Jacob really can't accept this. He _is_ hurting himself… and no matter how much that may hurt me, I can't blame myself.

Its just how it has to be…

Like I said, It's for the better…

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Ok wow… I know I said that I would be a normal lengthed chapter. But I guess I just keep writing too much. Haha. Well that's good for you I guess. Haha. And I know I'm taking FOREVER! But school is getting hectic. Haha. And life is even more hectic! If you can believe that. Haha and I know I kinda rushed it at the end… I'm sorry! I just really wanted to end it before it got too long. Haha.

And as always, I believe this was not my best work but oh well! Haha

Any who… here are my personal thank you's to you whom reviewed! :D

Thanks,

**Ametiste-lover**: Haha I know! I'm late! I'm soo sorry!! Would you understand if I said I was prolonging the moment? Whatever that means? Haha yes I know. I promise to write that scene. Its just I really needed to end it. Haha. Ah, I assume ur a Jacob fan. Well… I'm not really one myself but I do sympathize him. I find him annoying on several counts, he just can't seem to take a hint… haha well any who. Thanks for reviewing. I hoped you like this chapter too! haha

Thanks,

**Krystina the Alien**: Ah… well. Yes I suppose you did over due the late updating. Haha. But at least you updated right? And the most loyal fans whom like your story will keep reading and wait for you to update. :D Yes… haha well I thought since he was always careful around her, she should learn to be careful around him. Haha. Nice swap, wouldn't you agree? :D hope you liked this chapter as well. :D

Thanks,

**Sakura-Girl 2005**: haha oh! You got me. I was foreshadowing sort of I guess. In a way… but more like giving a hint. It sounds like you're not a big fan of Jake. Haha. But as I said before, I'm not a fan of his but I do sympathize him and I think it shows how much Bella really does love Edward by choosing him instead of Jacob, even when it hurts Jacob as much as it does. :)

Thanks,

**kimiko136**: Oh well thank you. :D and I will. Thanks a lot. Hope you loved this chapter as well. :D

Thanks,

**screaming the profanity xo**: Oh I know right. Took forever. Oh and great! This one is long too. Haha well… it is good. For you. Haha. Thanks for the compliment. And yes, I do agree, I was about to name the chapter something else like 'Aerodynamic' by Daft Punk but I felt that it didn't really fit it. Then I was about to change it to Metamorphosis or something along those lines… but from the song 'Newborn' by Muse it just kinda clicked and I decided ok… I'll do that. haha. A long irritating process and once I posted it… I found I made A MISTAKE! You have no idea how much it bothered me. It still does. I was thinking about fixing it and posting it up again… but people already made reviews and read it so I decided to ignore it. It was so hard to do that, but I did. But now that I think about it… I must strive to resist the urge to fix the error. Haha. I guess in some way… I'm a vampire. Haha. Only I don't have to resist blood. Haha. Or do I? ;D

Thanks,

**crzybookluvrchick4017**: Yes… Jacob. Well… I found that I couldn't just have him out of the story. I had to resolve the thing with Jake or I wouldn't be following the storyline very well. And since this is my view on what could happen in 'Breaking Dawn' I just had to put him in it. :D Thanks for reviewing I hope you liked this chap!

Thanks,

**Booksickle**: I know! I'm sorry! But now you know what happens! Haha. I'm sorry! Haha. I just had to leave it there… or it would've been too long! And I have to leave some ideas in other chapters too! Haha but still… I'M SORRY! Haha.

Woooo! Chapter Six is up and running!

And you all know what happens now… well at least in this chap. Haha

And once again thank you all for reviewing.

It means a lot… it really does.

Although I would like it if more of you reviewed but this is good. :D

Still… I would like it if more of you reviewed.

Just keep it in mind. Haha.

Well… I really hope you liked this chapter!

Thanks!!

Be back laterz! But not too later hopefully!

:D

bye bye!

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	7. Falling Away With You

AN: Chapter seven

AN: Chapter seven. This is nice. Very nice right? Haha. I lied. I actually did like the end of my last chapter. Hehe. I did! I did! Haha. Well any who… I hope you like this chapter too! :D enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse nor the characters that Stephenie Meyers owns. Even if I sound like her… I swear I'm not. She's too great. Haha. I can't believe I just compared myself to her. Slap myself. Haha.

I also do not own the song 'Falling Away with You' by Muse. Love that song. :D

Chapter Seven

Falling Away With You

Emmett's face contorted into extreme frustration as he struggled to keep his hand at bay.

His arm quivered under the stress while I felt quite bored.

I wasn't sure how many times I had won… I lost count after eight.

At first it was fun, but the more I won, the more Emmett became competitive. In short, he was quite the sore loser. I suppressed a giggle as I slowly let his arm fall to the floor.

We had moved to the floor after breaking three tables. Emmett thought it was hilarious and didn't mind to it. I on the other hand am going to replace all three as soon as I can. He snorted at that idea.

"Come on, one more time. I'm wearing you down I know it." I raised an eyebrow and let the sarcasm ooze out.

"Yup… my arm feels _so_ tired now." Grasping his bulky hand once again, I sighed and threw Edward a pleading look. He smirked.

"Ready, set, go!" Pushing with all his might, deep concentration overtook his features while I pushed effortlessly in boredom.

Although, I couldn't help but laugh under my breath a few times, which would always earn me a death glare from him. That's when I do my best to hide my smirk so Emmett wouldn't get too frustrated.

Watching our abnormal pale arms quiver from left to right, I made sure it was always in the middle when we started. Then to make it seem like he had _some_ effect on me, I slowly let it fall to my right, just to give him something to gloat about. At last I would finally let it slowly go back to my left, and watch as it hit the floor soundlessly.

Edward smirked. I knew he could see my obvious tactic I had devised. Luckily, Emmett didn't notice a thing.

"I almost had you! Did you see that Edward? I almost had her." Just as I planned, he used that opportune moment to boast. Although I expected this, it did irritate me a tiny bit. In response, my desiccated throat flared for the hundredth time, except, it was five times worse.

The last time I hunted was a few hours ago and I never minded to it. But every time I felt irritated or angry, it would burn and smolder, longing for the warm succulent liquid to saturate my thirst.

I could already imagine myself kneeling down and puncturing the flesh of a frail creature. Feeling the fresh venom pour from my mouth; injecting itself into the poor creature. Drinking needfully from its wound until every single drop filled my voracious hunger.

My stomach twisted and turned, wishing for the real thing instead of a tormenting daydream.

The torment grew agonizing. The longer I waited, I noticed how the hunger grew each time, making it much harder to ignore. At least until I calmed… then I didn't feel it at all, almost as if it were just a passing thought.

Now was different though. Because, even with me inside the confines of Tanya's beautiful home I could still smell the delightful scent of those poor defenseless creatures outside.

Not as strongly before, when I desperately struggled for control. It was more of something I argued with myself. One part of my mind kicked and screamed to run into the wild like the ravenous vampire I was. But another part remained calm, and reasonable just only wanting to stay with Edward, stay with my family.

I didn't quite understand how I was able to handle my erratic hunger, also how it seemed to disappear every time I calmed. In spite of that, I actually found that the kicking and screaming part didn't seem so bad. Taking a glance at Edward, I immediately objected to that thought.

"Uhm… you okay Bella?" Whisking away my thoughts, I found my hand clamping Emmett's hand in a death grip. Also noting the pool of fresh venom in my mouth.

That was also something I didn't understand. Typical Vampire characteristics appear to present themselves fashionably late. Not that I mind. It's nice to tackle things one at a time.

"Oh… Sorry." Releasing my incredible grip on his hand, I avoided his gaze, swallowing down large amounts of venom. Suddenly feeling Edwards' soft hand on my own, I relaxed instantly.

"Come." He ordered. Pulling me up with him off the floor he guided me back to the marvelous oak door, outside. I groaned.

"Edward I'm fine really. Its nothing I can't handle, honestly." Already the scent of an animal began to plague my thoughts. I didn't even believe myself at this point. I stiffened.

"Bella, please don't torment yourself." Almost pleading to me he grabbed my shoulders and put on a heartfelt expression, my heart sunk instantly, "You don't have to prove anything to me. I know you're strong. So please, for me… go hunt. You'll feel much better." My stomach began to lurch and twist in that empty yearn for blood. I heard what he said, but thinking rationally was even more difficult than I thought.

All I could think of was imagining myself tearing a creature to shreds while its blood showered me. Covering myself from head to toe while I smiled in satisfaction. At once I shook my head from those absurd thoughts.

I wanted to disagree with him, and say that I could handle it, but my bloodlust was harder to control every second, especially with that wretched animal nearby. Not to mention the smoldering in my throat screeching at me, I ultimately found myself nodding my head in agreement.

Edward smiled sincerely, but seemed a bit confused that I had agreed with him so easily without causing a scene.

Suddenly behind me, I heard footsteps coming. Turning my head to see who it was, I saw Emmett, Alice and Jasper smiling at me while they walked toward us. My hunger paused in its tantrum, as I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Hey, what are you guys doing out here?" I knew the answer to that question, but in a way, I was trying to convince myself that wasn't the reason. Emmett raised an eyebrow peculiarly at me.

"We're going hunting of course." He stated matter-of-factly. I internally groaned as my hunger impatiently protested. Like a restless child, it shrieked in annoyance.

"Fine whatever." I muttered. Trudging off into the ice-covered woods, I couldn't help but notice that look of concern Edward gave me from the corner of my eye and that Rosalie wasn't beside Emmett.

I know she just needs time but I just really want all of us to be a family. '_Its too soon to think like that…_' I thought glumly.

It all happened so fast then. I abruptly became lost in my hunger when I caught the scent of that animal. I didn't even care that my family was behind me when I took off at full speed to the animal.

Everything in my vision was crystal clear. It was unbelievable how much I missed when I was human. From the tip of a tiny blade of grass to my doomed meal miles away from me; I could see everything. Things that wouldn't be possible for human eyes to witness.

At last I was only a few miles away from my prey. In that moment, I knew the predator inside took over. Starved as the predator was, I felt nothing could come between it and I.

Venom poured into my mouth like a wild river.

I wanted it. No, I needed it. Nobody was taking this away from me.

Finally the ill-fated animal came into focus, only taking me a second to sink my teeth into it.

I drank needfully from it, not bothering to gorge myself in its scent this time.

At once I thought of how badly I treated my last kill, and wished for a less painful death for this one. Quickly I cracked its neck before quenching my thirst further, not able to stop completely, but only to slow down.

It seemed like hours before the flow of the blood slowed. That's when I heard shuffling beside me. Craning my neck to see the cause of the sound, I found a dark furred grizzly towering over me, breathing heavily as it sniffed in the scent of my kill.

It took me a moment to realize I was drinking from a full-grown moose. Feeling the blood drip into my already blood soaked shirt, I stared up into the starved eyes of the grizzly just waiting for it to move.

The thirst built inside as the grizzly roared, contending for the dead moose.

Adrenaline rushed through my body, pushing out the predator further as I shifted into a crouch, ready to attack and protect my meal if necessary.

I could practically feel how hungry this animal was, it made me unbearably thirsty. At once I felt my eyes turn jet black, and launched myself toward the grizzly.

Too fast for its slow, powerful moves, I quickly caught its jaw in my hands and sneered into its eyes before snapping its neck and gorging myself once again.

This time not letting any drop of blood get wasted.

I pulled back feeling refreshed; like myself.

It was strange that I didn't feel sad about murdering two animals. It just felt like that was nature, and I was the top predator on this earth. I felt idiotic for thinking that, and scoffed at that thought.

Recalling my last hunt with Edward, I quickly buried my two kills. Bringing a hand up to my chin, I found the blood had smeared along my chin and neck down to my shirt.

I groaned while looking at my shirt. Now Alice definitely won't let me keep it.

'_Alice…_' I thought bewildered. I'd forgotten about Alice. Glancing around in the trees, I couldn't see anything but frost and bark. That's when I heard him from behind.

In one swift movement I turned around and immediately wrapped my arms around him and kissed him furiously. Edward smirked into the kiss, mystified but glad.

I nearly laughed as he grunted again. I pulled away reluctantly to see blood smeared around his mouth. I smiled sheepishly while he licked his lips, tasting the blood.

"Oh, sorry." I muttered. He smiled.

"Don't apologize. I should be. I hadn't even realized you left until I heard the bear." His smirk then faded.

"Are you alright? You seemed a bit angry before." Concern overtook his features, instantly making me depressed.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was thirsty. Especially with the animal nearby, it was a bit irritating having to wait." I smiled softly, imagining how I looked through his eyes: A true monster. Luckily these words didn't bother me. It probably would've bothered him more than me. He smirked, brushing a loose strand of hair away from my face.

"You know, Emmett was quite jealous that you found a grizzly so easily. He was about to steal it away from you… that is, until he saw your face. He won't admit it, but he was actually quite frightened." He smiled crookedly showing his pearly whites. Of course, he dazzled me beyond comprehension.

Somewhere in the forest, I heard Emmett snort in denial. I muffled a chuckle, trying to imagine Emmett being frightened. It didn't look right.

"Did I really look _that_ scary?" His smile faltered for a moment, but then he recovered with a majestic smile.

"More ominous than scary. I never thought _I'd_ live the day to see you of all people give off a threatening façade. It was very interesting to witness." I rolled my eyes at him, letting my eyes wander to his.

His coral irises glimmered in the light, when I noticed a very light butterscotch color on the outer rim. My breath caught in my chest at how gorgeous they were.

Contrasting with his skin and his bronze hair beautifully, I nearly fell over at their allure.

Slowly leaning towards me, he brushed his warm lips lightly against mine. Slightly parting my lips to take in his marvelous scent, the kiss turned passionate. Letting our tongues dance with each other, my mind instantly clouded.

Only managing to focus on this moment, my knees fought for the strength to stay steady.

Keeping my embrace soft around his neck, my hands lost themselves in his hair. His grip tightened around my waist, putting more devotion into the kiss than I thought possible.

Finally breaking away from my lips, he planted kisses along my jaw to my neck, and then slowly left a trail of kisses from my neck back to my lips. I was amazed to hear his breathing was just as ragged as mine.

Letting our foreheads rest against each other, we both let each other catch our breath.

"I love you Isabella Cullen." He spoke breathlessly.

"I love you too Edward Cullen. With all my heart." I replied breathless as well. Unable to even out my breathing, I resorted to breathing through my nose.

Quickly glancing at my shirt, he smiled softly, already breathing normally.

"We'd better head back. You never did have the pleasure to see what clothes Alice and Rosalie got you." I cringed immediately, forgetting Alice had taken the initiative to buy me new clothes, I groaned inwardly.

One by one, each Cullen presented themselves next to us, forming a half circle of five.

"Let's head back now." Edward announced. With everyone's eyes a bright topaz, with the exception of Edward's and mine, we all walked in the direction of Tanya's house.

Emmett snickered a few times at Edward's face. Especially since I was the only one with blood running down my neck, and his smeared around his mouth… well, I was quite embarrassed and kept my head down. Edward stood tall with a proud smile on his lips ignoring Emmett's jokes. After a while Emmett stopped his teasing.

Once Tanya's mansion came into view, Edward stopped in his tracks, but the others kept walking, his eyes focused into nothingness. That's when it clicked into my head. Edward could hear someone's mind, and from the look on his face, he wasn't very happy about it.

Then slowly, his frown turned into a smirk. Glancing at me, he kissed my cheek and continued walking. As he pulled me along around my waist, I stared at him completely puzzled.

'_Mood swings_' I thought dryly and rolled my eyes.

As we neared this glorious home, a new smell filled the air. Breathing in the new scent, I found it was like smelling a bouquet of blood red roses, if not for the tartness in it. It was a like a sour candy, only, I could smell the taste.

It was a gorgeous smell; nonetheless, I thought Edward smelled five billion times better than this scent.

Finally walking up to the oak door, I found there weren't one scent but two; however, the tart rose one was the strongest in my opinion. I wondered if Edward could smell it too.

I looked up at him apprehensively. I wasn't sure why this scent made me edgy, or why Edward hadn't said anything about it yet. He smiled.

"Ready to meet Tanya?" He whispered softly, just loud enough for me to hear. I could feel my eyes bulge.

Tanya? The leader of the Denali Coven Tanya? The same Tanya who showed 'interest' in Edward? _My_ Edward?

I was torn between two emotions, the first one utter perturbation, and the second, unbearable jealousy. Though, I was curious to meet the Strawberry blonde vampire, I was also dreading it.

"Is that who I'm smelling?" I asked acidly. Edward laughed, amused by my tone.

"Depends on what you smell." Pursing my lips, I found that I wasn't so happy to meet her, even after everything she had done for us. Feeling a pang of guilt, I surprisingly ignored it.

I suddenly felt an elbow nudge me on my left, I turned slowly to glare at whoever it was, praying it wasn't Tanya. Thankfully it was Jasper, I sighed and softened my antagonistic expression. Alice and Emmett raised an eyebrow behind him, Emmett's one of amusement.

Putting his hand on my shoulder, I let the tranquility take over me. If I continued with the hostile thoughts, I would probably end up breaking apart the Denali clan and my family forever. I'd already done enough damage as it is.

The serene emotion washed through my body and mind, letting me think clearly. Unfortunately even my serene side wanted to rip her to shreds. Just the thought alone of her being in the same room with Edward was enough to make my blood boil… ironic enough.

Pushing the door open, Edward led me through keeping his arm around me in a protective hold. I gave a surly expression as I dragged my feet. There was no word to how I felt.

Gritting my teeth as we neared the door to the living room, I heard two new voices. They were soft, and most of all music to my ears. Like pleasant bells of heaven itself chiming away. A sharp jab of jealousy pierced my stomach, or was that my hunger? I was too angry to tell.

Reluctant as I was, my curiosity got the better of me. Avoiding Edward's amused gaze, I glared at the floor. I know I hadn't really thought about it much. That part was obvious, but I really couldn't understand why I was acting this way.

Tanya had already shown me so much kindness. If she really didn't want anything to happen between Edward and I, she wouldn't have left with the others to give us privacy. Or let us come here at all. Especially with Irina's grudge with the pack, why would she show so much kindness with even her sisters angry with us, with me?

Letting that thought sink in, I realized something. I only hear two euphonious voices; if the Denali coven really did come, shouldn't there be five separate voices I should be hearing?

The wood flooring I was glaring at was motionless. My body grew rigid at the second realization. We had stopped.

"Hello." I cringed immediately to her unbelievably harmonious voice. Tearing my gaze away from the floor, I met with two warm golden eyes.

My eyes widened at what I was seeing. Tanya, my _rival_ was standing before me; smiling. It took every effort in my body to smile back. The curiosity was evident in her too welcoming eyes.

Searching for my voice, I fiddled with the hemming on my shirt and stared her in the eyes, also noticing Carlisle, Esme, and Rosalie sitting on the couch, waiting for us to join them.

"H-hello." My voice sounded strained with my effort. Her smile widened in response.

She was just how I pictured she would be. A pleasant façade, with just a hint of a backstabbing notion. And of course, she was extraordinarily gorgeous. Her strawberry blonde hair straight and silky looking, just curling in the right places, and accentuating her abnormal beauty even more. My hands clenched into fists unwillingly as I took in her alluring appearance.

She wore a light pink colored lipstick, as well as black eyeliner. Showing off her pearly whites, she was absolutely breath taking. Peeling my gaze away from her face, I quickly noticed she wore an exceedingly short black mini skirt showing off her slender pale legs, with a black corset hugging her curves like a latex glove, and a white long sleeved suit jacket that stopped where the corset started at the top. And at last she wore two six inched white-heeled black stilettos, my eyes bulged. '_Could she wear anything _more_ revealing!_'

Taking in her appearance, it seemed she was going toward a more professional look, when playboy took over.

The air was tense; even I could tell. Not that I knew how everyone else was taking this, I wasn't even sure if Edward was next to me or not.

Edward leading me to the couch, across from Carlisle, Esme, and Tanya, answered my thought.

"You must be the infamous Bella, the one I've heard _so_ much about?" Her tone was too polite, almost mocking me. Everything about her… was… too much. Every fiber in my body wanted to wrench every perfect hair off her head. I internally grimaced. I was acting like a child.

"Yes. Are you Tanya?" Attempting to make my voice sound friendly, I only succeeded in making it sound even more hostile. Surprisingly her smile widened.

"That's right." Looking me up and down like I was an art piece she were about to buy, my gaze began to turn into a glare, "Pleased to make your acquaintance." Abruptly I saw her eyes shift to my right, her grin widened as her eyes narrowed. Right then I was instantly aware of Edward's arm around my waist, apparently, so was she.

"Hello Edward, long time no see." Her voice turned seductive like honey, my mouth opened slightly in protest. Quickly closing my mouth, I glanced at Edward, and found that he was no longer smiling, his lips clamped into a tight line. I tried my hardest not to laugh.

Giving a stiff nod toward her, she smiled at him. A smile that would make any mans heart melt. Swiftly throwing me a glance, she then continued to my right onward past Edward.

"Alice, Jasper, Emmett," She sighed, faux heartbreak drenched in her tone, "Its been far too long." She smiled again. My eyes narrowed, as frustration filled my emotions, I was now suddenly aware of Carlisle's questioning gaze and the equally perplexed brunette haired woman sitting next to Esme, beside Tanya staring at me.

Noticing my gaze toward the stunning stranger, surprise overtook Tanya's features. I was suddenly taken by surprise. I hadn't even noticed she were there.

"Oh I'm sorry, where are my manners? Bella, this is my sister Kate." Kate seemed to be in a trance for a moment, but then blinked and smiled.

She was equally as beautiful as Tanya. Her brown wavy hair long and luxurious, even I wanted to run my fingers through it. Her piercing golden eyes outlined with black eyeliner like her sister, with pale pink lip-gloss covering her lips, contrasting with her ivory skin beautifully. She wore a beautiful black lace baby doll dress with white accents, a white bow around her midsection tied around the back. Also completing her high-end apparel she wore a pair of black six-inched stiletto heels as well. I could only imagine how much money she spent on it.

It seemed none of them cared about the cold weather, especially when they're trying to be inconspicuous to the humans. It wouldn't matter though. No human would be able to see them anyway; we're too far from civilization.

"I am very pleased to meet you. We have heard so much about you, yet so little. I do apologize that the others could not come. Irina is still grieving Laurent's death." A shiver coursed through my spine at the mention of his name. Of course Irina didn't want to see me. I was the reason Laurent died. Leaning toward me, Kate smiled apologetically, "And do mind my sister. From what I hear, your temper matches Edward's." I looked down as if I were blushing. Tanya pursed her lips in a pout and crossed her arms.

"She wanted to see if that were true," Kate chuckled, talking more to Edward than me, "Hmmm, hot headed girl meets hot headed boy? what are the odds." Shaking her head as if in disbelief, she winked at me. Her eyes held something in them, something almost like curiosity, but she shifted them away from me before I could interpret them, to Edward, raising an eyebrow.

Glancing at Edward from the corner of my eye, I saw him smile in response, obviously she was telling him something in her mind. I grumbled inwardly. I hated it when people did that.

"Where are Carmen and Eleazar?" Carlisle asked unexpectedly. Making me suddenly aware of my family around us. Strange, I had almost forgotten they were there.

Tanya perked up and smiled sadly, almost as if she were apologizing for something, "Since Irina stayed behind, Carmen didn't feel right by leaving her so she stayed with her. Eleazar decided to stay with them." The guilt finally poured in.

Of course Irina didn't want to come. She didn't want to come because _I_ am the reason Laurent died. I was a second away from death when Jacob and his pack rescued me… killing Laurent… leaving a permanent scar between my family and the Denali coven.

My bad luck works in wonders, doesn't it.

Tanya's tone abruptly turned hostile, her elegant features etched in anger, "Those _dogs_ are the reason why my sister suffers." She spat angrily. Kate frowned slightly, clearly still grieving for their sister, when Tanya looked up abruptly, eyes wide apprehensively.

"Of course, we would never do anything without your consent Carlisle. We respect you too much to trespass on your territory. I only apologize for not helping you when you needed it." A frown covered her features as Carlisle smiled reassuringly.

"That can be overlooked, it's entirely understandable." Tanya smiled half heartedly, most likely wishing she could take that as an excuse. So was I.

Suddenly Alice perked up her head, frowning, "Won't you stay longer?" Kate smiled softly, her smile speaking for itself.

"Yes, please. We rarely see you as it is." Esme said, giving Kate and Tanya a pleading look. My heart crumbled at Esme's expression, and I could tell theirs did too.

Silence coated the room as they thought. Finally Kate gave in, "I suppose we could stay the night." Esme gleamed with joy. Then a burst of happiness shot through me, and I even felt myself smiling a little; Jasper must have been behind that. Tanya nodded in approval, standing up from her seat, she smiled softly.

"I'll call Eleazar and tell him we're staying the night but, in the meantime, I'd like to speak with you Carlisle, if you would follow me…" Breaking off suggestively, she headed into the hallway, stopping a few inches in front of the doorway; she smiled sweetly at me for a moment before disappearing around the corner, Carlisle and Esme following right behind her.

I sat there puzzled by Tanya's sudden show of kindness. It took me a few moments to realize Kate was still sitting in the same spot, staring at me like before. I shifted uncomfortably under her trance-like gaze until she finally smiled.

"Its fascinating being around you." She began, still smiling like she were in a trance, "I mean, I've heard about your immunity against Edward, Jane, and even Aro himself, but, to experience it is another thing. It's quite frustrating, but… nice." Everything clicked together at once. Of course, Edward had mentioned this before.

Kate and Eleazar were the only two in the Denali coven, who had special gifts and that they both had to do with the mind. Curiosity burned through me instantly, when a thought came to mind. Had she been trying to do something to me this whole time?

Glancing to my right past Edward, I looked Jasper and Alice for comfort only to find that they had disappeared. And not only did they leave, but Rosalie and Emmett too. I grew slightly panicked. Had she done something to them?

Reading my wary expression, she smiled apologetically yet again, "I'm sorry. I was curious. I tried to provoke you to stand up for yourself. When that didn't work, I tried it on the others, to see if my influence could make them leave. It worked on everybody except Edward. Of course." She rolled her eyes in annoyance; there was something I was missing. If it didn't work on Edward, then why am I so special? Kate smiled again, and continued, ignoring my perplexed expression, "I could tell my sister was laying it on a little thick. Tanya is all about getting what she wants, its uncommon for someone to say no to her. It's quite amusing to see her like this… she's rarely ever jealous-" Abruptly, Edward cleared his throat loudly, almost like a growl. Kate smirked; clearly she had said too much… something Edward didn't feel necessary for me to know.

At last I met his face, he smiled happily, no doubt trying to elude me from what Kate was attempting to say.

"It's been a long day Bella, and your still wearing the same clothes from 4 days ago. Wouldn't you like to change?" Glancing at my blood dried shirt, my body flushed with embarrassment. Had it really been that long since I showered?

"Oh… uhmm yeah. Well, I guess it's just been a really busy day. I'm a mess aren't I." Edward smiled crookedly for the first time in a while; it made my silent heart flutter.

"You look beautiful. Even with the blood… you look menacingly gorgeous. It's a first." A think haze clouded my mind from his breath. His luscious scent captured my senses pulling me close to him like gravity.

I immediately creased my eyebrows in frustration. He was doing this on purpose; and it was working.

"I'm amazed Edward. You actually listened to me." Kate stated unexpectedly. Edward paused in this heated moment, almost making me pout in disappointment. He smirked absently, almost as if he were still in Kate's control.

My eyes widened at how much he was trying to resist whatever she was doing to him. I could see the internal battle in his eyes, though they were a light coral with gold brimming on the sides, they were dead with intense focus. Suddenly, he turned his head and smiled, this time it touched his eyes; he won.

"Protrude all you wish Kate. I'm in control now." His pale face smoothed out in relaxation, it seemed he didn't have any trouble at all now. Kate pushed her bottom lip out in a pout.

"No matter how much you resist Edward, you still want her." Kate simpered blithely, making me freeze in complete embarrassment. Edward continued to smile.

"There's no possible way for me to stop." Edward replied in a strangely husky voice. Kate raised her eyebrows, astounded that he said this.

It was most likely the thought that she didn't make him say this; it was him. Nonetheless, my embarrassment intensified.

"Lets go Bella. Before I embarrass you further." Edward spoke hastily as chagrin burned through my veins. That's when I realized it _was_ her. Kate smirked satisfyingly.

Grabbing my hand, me dragged me out into the hall, up the stairs, and into our room before our lips crushed against each other. My eyes shut out of reflex as my hands roamed over his slender physique. Mussing his already tousled bronze hair, he pulled my body against his.

Pushing me up against the wall, his lips trailed down to my throat, allowing me to breathe. Gulping down air, my skin tingled were he touched. Suckling on my throat, I struggled to keep in the moan that desperately wanted out.

Our breaths became harsh and labored. If someone were listening, you'd think we were humans exhausted from running. It took every effort in my body not to laugh from that thought.

Abruptly, he pulled away from me and let ourselves catch our breath when I noticed his lips were still covered with blood. Biting my lip, I found that the blood had dried on my lips too. I could only imagine how I looked. Most likely absurd.

"I apologize. That wasn't like me." Edward smiled as if proud he did it anyway. In all fairness, I didn't mind at all.

"Really? Because I think it was _very_ much like you." I teased. He chuckled, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

"In that case…" He trailed off suggestively, leaning close to me, pressing against me on purpose and planting frivolous kisses on my neck.

"Edward!" I gasped, my body flushing instantly. He laughed into my hair, and whispered seductively into my ear.

"Listen…" He began, sounding rather disappointed, "I would love to be with you right now, but I have to speak with Carlisle. _We_ however, will continue this later." He breathed into my skin, making me shiver with joy. I nodded and bit my lip.

"I'll be counting on it." I responded breathlessly. Kissing me one last time, he smirked and walked out the door, closing it behind him.

I stared after him, not able to move or even blink. Evening out my breathing, I leaned against the wall. Absolutely dumbfounded that I was together with the most perfect person in the entire world. I sighed, feeling completely content.

Finally able to find my muscles, I walked to the antique dresser next to our bed and opened the doors to find not my own clothing, but expensive looking apparel. I grimaced.

"Alice…" I seethed, speaking to no one in particular.

Glaring at every ridiculously priced fabric on the hangers, I noticed that all of them had their tags ripped off. I rolled my eyes, annoyed that Alice and Rosalie could do this to me.

I grumbled and grabbed the first thing I saw. Tearing it off the hangar I pulled open the drawer under them and found that even my socks were replaced as well. I scoffed; enraged that Alice even bought me soft overpriced underwear of all types with matching bras to go with them.

'_You are _so_ dead Alice Cullen!_' I thought savagely as I grabbed a white-laced light blue bikini underwear attached to a matching bra and trudged into the bathroom.

Absentmindedly discarding my clothes, I reached for the shower knob labeled 'H' for hot. Clutching it tightly in my hand, I heard a screeching groan from underneath my fingers. I jumped at the sound and pulled my hand away to see an indent of my hand in the silver medal, I gasped as my eyes widened.

"Oh crap." I muttered. I clearly need to be more careful. Taking a deep breath, I reached for the dented silver knob again.

Placing my hand on the knob once more, I lightly gripped it with my index finger and thumb, as if I were holding a cotton ball and slowly turned it to the left until water began to pour freely from the showerhead.

Walking into the tub I carelessly grabbed the bar of soap, and felt it squish inside my hand. I huffed and grimaced angrily at the white goo. Ignoring it for the time being, I grabbed the pink loofa hanging from the hook to my left, scrubbing all remnants of moose and grizzly blood, careful not to crush it into tiny particles of pink sand.

Letting the steam emit from the boiling water, I was amazed I couldn't feel anything but a slight warm sensation from the liquid ricocheting off my pale granite skin.

Rinsing my hair from the strawberry scented shampoo I brought from home, I let my strained muscles relax under the warm water.

My eyes narrowed when Tanya crept into my thoughts. How I wish she could've been the shower knob. I would've loved to put a dent in her face. I smirked wickedly to myself at the thought.

Turning toward the injured knob, I slowly reached for it and very lightly turned it to the right. I must've turned it too much because the metal groaned again. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

Stepping out of the tub, I cautiously grabbed my white towel, for fear it would disintegrate at the slightest touch, and very carefully dried myself.

I groaned and eyed the pricey apparel. I grumbled loudly and grabbed the baby blue underwear and bra. I grudgingly put them both on. Curiosity burned through me once again. Unable to bear it, I look up into the mirror and examined my reflection.

My hair, though damp and dripping with water, still looked soft and silky beyond comprehension. My arms were pale and slender with lean muscles, as well as the rest of my body. My curves became more defined and it seemed even my breasts were bigger. Gazing at my abnormal beauty, I saved my eyes for last.

My eyes still a vibrant red, almost glowing by themselves, held interest, curiosity, and something I wasn't familiar with… fascination?

I admit that I had never thought of myself as beautiful when I was human, but the only other person that I know of whose beauty was amplified by the change was Rosalie.

She was already breathtakingly gorgeous before the change, and of course the outcome resulted in unbelievable beauty, but why have I obtained the same incredible siren-like allure?

I was only decent looking. An ordinary human girl, with brown eyes and brown hair… how is it possible that the change did _this_? It couldn't have been just the change alone… it has to be more.

This thought irritated me. Not only was my strength out of control, but also now I have a whole new thing to contemplate about. This is definitely going to keep me up at night.

I grimaced slightly when a thought struck me. I nearly laughed at my own idiocy. How could I forget that sleep is impossible and unnecessary for me now? I chuckled and turned to put on the other clothes Alice and Rosalie bought.

Examining the clothes I picked randomly, I sighed hopelessly.

In my hands I held an off the shoulder long sleeved white shirt, with a black tank top to put under it, as well as a black skirt. Luckily, it wasn't too short, but it was short enough for me to curse under my breath while I put them on.

Looking at my reflection once again, I stared at myself and found that I didn't look bad at all. The clothes fit snuggly against my curves, showing off my defined stomach if I raised my arms just a fraction of an inch higher as the skin on my shoulders and legs glimmered in the light.

Gazing at my reflection, I instantly saw myself standing next to Edward and grinned with glee that I could finally say that I fit.

Not only would I stand out, but I would stand out with them… with my family; The Cullen's… the family of Vampires. A smile graced my features when I thought that.

Quickly drying my hair with a blow dryer, I was stumped with what I should do with it. Fiddling with my hair, I sighed and decided to leave it down, though I was amazed that it still looked gorgeous. Curls in the right places, and straight in the right places… I looked better than decent.

At last exiting our bathroom, I walked out and found that Edward was still nowhere to be seen. My heart plunged to the ground. Sure, he was only downstairs, but whenever he's out of my grasp, or sight… I can't stand it.

Sulking toward the antique dresser, I looked through the drawers and found the exorbitant socks. I sighed hopelessly once again… heaving a sigh in desolation; I put on the low-cut socks without a second thought.

I sat on our bed, morose and empty, waiting for Edward to return to me. I tried listening to hear if he was coming or not, but it was dead silent and I could hear no voices or even a finger tapping. My shoulders slumped down as I waited for him… to tell you the truth, I found it pretty pathetic I was acting this way.

Though, It can't be helped… he's my everything.

Absently tracing circles on my thighs while I waited, a single ray of light shone through the curtains onto the back of my hand. My skin sparkled like a thousand diamonds under the sunlight when I noticed my scar was still present, and that my wedding ring on my left hand was not, nor was my bracelet.

I immediately began to panic. '_Did I break them?_' I thought, horrified of the very idea. Hyperventilating as I searched the bed, I became frantic when I felt a pair of warm arms embrace me, holding me tight.

Edward's soothing words calmed me down the instant I heard them. My breathing evened out.

"Shh, it's ok Bella, what's wrong? What happen?" He asked, immensely concerned.

"My ring... my bracelet. They're gone!" I managed to choke out. Throwing myself to him, to show him I was sorry. The only thing he did was chuckle, and pull my face to his, smiling the whole time.

Keeping my face just inches apart from his, he spoke reassuringly, "It's ok Bella. It's fine… they're fine. You didn't lose them; I have them." I blinked for a few minutes to let that register until I finally found my voice.

"You have them?" His grin widened.

"Yes, I put them in a box. They're safe." Confusion overtook my emotions. I thought that through for a minute before answering.

"Why?" I questioned, "Don't you want me to wear them?" Amusement filled his eyes as he smiled. I was completely perplexed, he wanted to marry me but not let me wear the ring? Isn't that the whole point of getting married?

"Yes I do, but not if you're so oblivious to your own strength that you would break them without even noticing." He explained, smirking the whole time. My expression fell into embarrassment.

"Oh…" Was all I managed to say. He smiled courteously, no doubt trying to make me feel less of a fool.

"I thought that… if you broke them, you would be upset. I didn't want you to worry about it, so before you woke from your change, I took them off. I'm sorry I didn't mention it earlier. Must've slipped my mind." Already my heart came back to me. Euphoria passed through me as I sighed in relief.

"It's fine. I'm just glad I _didn't_ break them. But I would like to wear them when I can control my strength. Okay?" His eyes searched my expression before smiling. Maybe he thought I was joking, since I detested that ring before, but now… seeing that it proves to everyone I am bound to him, I would gladly wear it.

"Deal." He answered happily. Closing my eyes, I embraced him softly resting my head on his shoulder when I heard him sigh.

"I'm sorry I took so long. Kate was making it very difficult for me to speak with Carlisle. You don't know how hard it is to resist two voices of temptation. I was five seconds away from barging up here and taking you where you stand." He chuckled against my ear, making me shiver with delight.

A question came to mind when I thought of Kate. Something I should've asked before, but didn't have the chance to ask until now. Then another thing came to mind. The talk he had with Carlisle, but thinking it through, I thought better of it and I decided to save it for another conversation.

"That reminds me," I began, pulling back to gaze into his eyes, "What is it _exactly_ that Kate can do?" He pondered for a moment, his eyes distant as he thought. Then, they focused onto me, and he smiled softly.

"Well, as you know, Kate has a power that works with the mind. She can plant thoughts and suggestions into minds of others; like the ultimate persuader." He rolled his eyes in an aggravated way. I smiled, "It works better on humans, since their minds are weak. Nonetheless, it's a very dangerous gift. If she isn't careful, she could plague the mind of a human and drive them mad. All morals of right and wrong shattered with the intent she created for them. But sometimes, on rare occasions, you can resist it like I have. Although, sometimes even the strongest of us fall victim to her uncanny influence." He finished while rolling his eyes once again. deep down, I was entirely thankful I was impervious to her unnatural gift… but Edward wasn't. Then his eyes abruptly turned tight, his face hardened.

It was then that I realized it was my expression that caused this. I struggled on how to go about this.

"So…" I began, not sure how to properly phrase this, "If she wanted to, could she 'persuade' you to fall in love with _Tanya_." I hissed her name through clenched teeth; my hatred for her undeniable. Yet, he surprised me by smiling, comprehension flittering across his features.

"She could never sway the love I have for you. Even if she wanted to, she could never change the way I feel about you." Holding his hand up to my cheek, I held it there, taking in his incredible scent.

"Never?" I challenged, earning me a heartfelt smile from him, the love in his eyes illuminating.

"I have fallen for you Bella. I've fallen so far; I can't imagine ever coming back up for air. You are my air… You are my everything." I smiled, remembering myself thinking that not too long ago.

"And I am falling away with you. Forever." His eyes twinkled with more love than I thought possible.

"I love you Bella… so much." He whispered.

"Not as much as I love you." I argued, a chuckle erupting from my lips.

Slowly I pressed my lips lightly onto his, savoring the moment before it turned harsh and needy with passion.

Abruptly pausing in the kiss, Edward pulled back, grinning mischievously, "Now, where were we?" He question innocently. I smirked and tackled him to the bed, continuing what we had started.

It wasn't long before I found myself underneath him in indescribable pleasure.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Ok uhhmmm. You guys are probably very angry with me now.

Please…

I'M SO SORRY!! (SOB) I AM! PLEASE! FORGIVE ME! (SOB)

It's really been a few hectic weeks… I know that is hardly an excuse…

So please… you don't have to accept my apology… just let me know that you loved this chapter ok?

Be nice to me… it's my birthday today... okay? :D

And also… sorry if you find a lot of errors in here. I just finished this chap today and wanted to ease your suffering. Okay? Don't be angry! :(

By the way… if you want to see Kate's baby doll dress, then here is the link. I love it. It's beautiful. Haha

/shopping/images/blacklacelongtopwwhiteaccen.jpg Kate's dress.

And here's Tanya's clothing if you wanna look at it. :D ignore Victoria Beckham if you will… haha picture Tanya in it… okay? And how… slutty she looks for Edward… haha just kidding. Lol not but seriously. Haha

img515.imageshack.us/img515/8453/74408340pu4.jpg Tanya's apparel.

And here is my personal thank you's…

And sobby apologies… :)

Thanks,

**NightOwl999**: Wow thanks… that's really… nice of you. Haha. I don't know… I think she'd update much faster than me though. And… I'm sorry it took so long. I really am… forgive me :D

Thanks,

**crzybookluvrchick4017**: haha hope you liked this one too. And I'm sorry. Yes… I really am. I took so long… I'm sorry! :(

Thanks,

**Sara the Happy Grimm Reaper**: haha ok.. well I hoped you like the rest of my story past chapter 4. :) and I am soooo sorry about the long wait. I swear… I was suffering along with everyone else.

Thanks,

**oneiros lykos**: yeah… I thought that she wouldn't seem right if she weren't clumsy. Like she wouldn't be Bella. Even as a Vampire… I think she would keep some qualities she had before she changed… and once again… I am soo sorry for the long wait. Forgive me…. please… ;(

Thanks,

**moonbeam228**: you just found my fic, and I let you down. I am soo sorry! I really am. (sob) I'm sorry!

Thanks,

**Ametiste-lover**: Go wild I made it longer than the other. Haha. And I'll bet ur about dead now huh… (sigh)… (SOB) I AM SO SORRY! FORGIVE ME! (SOB) I DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO TAKE THIS LONG! (SOB) (SOBBING PATHETICALLY)…IM… SO… SORRY………. So how'd you like the arm wrestling match with Emmett? Hehe and yeah.. dumb Jacob.. lol aww thanks. You're too kind. :D seriously… and sure… I'll check out ur stories for ya… :D (don't worry… I've sent longer. Haha)

Thanks,

**TwlightatMidnight**: thanks… I hope you thought the rest of my story was good also. And I am sorry once again for the long wait. Seriously... I am. :(

Thanks,

**shinny-silver-volvo-owner**: Thanks very much. I'll be amazed if you even like this story now. I took forever… I'm so very sorry. And FYI… I will get to the part about her power soon. I promise I will… :D

Thanks,

**silence's light 79**: oh thank you. Yes… I'm trying my best to make more romance between them. And as I said before, I will get to her power soon. But I gave a very BIG clue in here. Well… more like hints leading up to it. Did you notice it? Hehe

Thanks,

**edwardcullansbuffy**: Thanks… and I am sorry for the long… torturous wait. I am sooo sorry... I am… really.

Thanks,

**sunsetXoverXfrance**: thanks a lot.. thank you. :D and I'm sorry. Very much I am…

ok.. chapter seven..

and OH MY GODD!

The twilight movie I am soo totally psyched for.

Even though most people do not like the choice for Edward. I do

I think he fits it… and he looks hott so.. yeah. Haha

/ teaser trailer.

Check out the teaser trailer!

I SO FREAKIN LOVE IT!

Haha

YAYZ! LOVE IT! CANNOT WAIT!

I'm soo freakin excited.

I think I might piddle.

Omg!! Can't wait! Hehehe

Be back laterz.

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	8. Authors Note

**Authors Note:**

Hello my fellow readers.

I know I have been beyond tardy with my updating… but I do have somewhat of a good reason why. It's pretty stupid really.

You see, at my school… we receive laptops for the school year. They say its higher education without pencil and paper and it's easier to learn since we have internet and Microsoft Word.

Well… I have to return it at the end of the school year and that day has come.

Unfortunately, I had the eighth chapter (not finished but close) on it and I was up to about… 4,000 words when my laptop was disabled. I cannot go into it without putting in a password which I do not know.

So I will plead to the laptop technicians to let me load that specific paper onto my home computer so that I can finish it.

It really pisses me off too because I was almost done and that I had the whole thing in my head and the creative flow is even more… flowy than before. Haha I know nice word right. Haha

BUT this is no laughing matter.

I am very angry with myself that I did not send it to myself when I had the chance. However, I am and will be a dumbass.

And I should let you know that if they do not allow me to load it to my home computer then I will have to write the whole thing over again… which I should mention will be a huge bitch because I had a lot of things happen in that chapter and it wont sound the same if I have to write 4,000 words over again... which I cannot repeat word for word.

I do not have photographic memory... although, it would be stupendous if I did, I, however do not. So I will have to rewrite it all over again. But just remember there's an _IF!!_

_IF!!_ They allow me to upload it onto my home computer then I will gladly kiss their toes in joy! Haha

So pray with me.

Pray!

I want that chapter and I do NOT want to write it all over again.

Although I have Muse on my side… it will be horrid if I have to write it over again.

If they do not… I will scream and cuss at them for you guys.

Up goes my middle finger, and down goes my tolerance. Haha

I really do wish to say I am sorry and that with this process, I will be taking longer updating but hopefully I will see chapter eight up and running within the next few days or a week or two.

Thank you for your patience.

Don't even know how you guys tolerate me.

Love you too much…

I'm not worth your love!

Shun ME!

_SHUN ME!_

But wow... this is the longest authors note i have ever seen. :)

Thanks.

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


	9. Hysteria Part One

AN: Chapter eight

AN: Chapter eight. Ok. So if you are reading this, then the damn lap technicians did not let me load the story onto my home computer, however! Its no biggie, I restored the story the best I could and wrote what I could remember, and I can say that this is better than the original :D. Do enjoy… and you better, took me forever to do this. HAHA just kidding. No but really… haha enjoy. :D

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse or… Breaking Dawn! I do not own any of the characters mentioned in the books nor do I own any of the occurrences or names. So… I own nothing. :)

Chapter Eight

Hysteria

Part One

We stayed in each others arms, both of us content with ourselves.

I felt at peace, in bliss. As if I'd found my own nirvana within my love, and I was sure Edward felt the same. It was unconceivable how two people –or beings- could be in so much love like us.

I clung to him as he rolled to the side, his breath rugged and husky. I blushed internally at the way his uneven breaths made me shiver in pleasure. It made my heart flutter to hear his angelic moans escape from his lips, and I'm certain it would be going a mile a minute right now if it were still beating.

It was then that I thought of the very first time we… _consummated_; I nearly laughed at my own choice of words, causing a smile to reveal itself on my lips.

It was that night, the first night as Mr. & Mrs. Edward Masen Cullen, that I saw my real husband. I stifled the giggle that threatened to show itself.

That night, Edward was just as much of a nervous wreck as I was: He fumbled with the buttons on my shirt, tripped over his own pants looking more flustered than I ever thought possible.

It was quite adorable really; I'd never seen him so vulnerable, or innocent for that matter. I suppose the thought alone of it being no boundary test, it being the real deal; scared him a little showing the, still a virgin, seventeen year-old Edward.

I clamped my lips tight, straining to keep the smile from getting wider. Edward scrutinized my expression, his eyes tight with curiosity.

I dropped my gaze but ultimately found myself staring back into his captivating eyes again, when I remembered something about that night.

I could remember it like it was yesterday.

_My pulse was spinning out of control._

_My face felt all hot and sticky causing a fresh new blush to creep up onto my cheeks. My hands quivered in exhilaration._

_I drew in a shaky breath, not sure if Edward were as clueless as I was. _

_His cool lips lingered near my neck, caressing the tension in my muscles. I was immediately overcome with an unreasonable amount of fear; I was utterly clueless about this and practically relying entirely on instinct, on feeling._

_His hands moved toward my bra. _

_My face burned with mortification. My mind went blank, only floating in the thick haze of desire. His hands stopped._

_He lifted his face from my neck and gazed into my eyes, the mortification slipping away ever so slightly. _

_It was that very moment that I knew. _

_We are meant to be and nothing can get in the way of that._

After that moment, we both relaxed and gave in to our desires, just concentrating on us. It was the most beautiful night of my life; every time was and is beautiful.

Thinking back to that memory, I couldn't help but get the sense I was blushing again.

Bringing myself back to the present, I sighed in content. We both remained silent in each others embrace; there were no need for words.

Laying here, in Edwards arms, our bodies bare against each other completely at ease, my hatred for Tanya seemed completely unreasonable.

I was sure my hostility towards her was justified, but being within the comforting embrace of Edwards arms, _I_ felt like the immoral one. I knew that if she really wanted to come between us, she wouldn't have left with her coven when Edward and I arrived. Surely this was only the newborn in me taking over.

Although, as Kate had said before, 'Tanya was putting it on a little thick', a little too thick I might add, but that was no reason for me to act so… feral.

As the Vampire I am, Edward would be considered my mate. Perhaps the newborn inside me is the one being overly territorial.

Truth be told, Tanya is gorgeous, nonetheless Rosalie obviously has her beat by far. So why am I jealous now? It has to be the Vampire in me; it is the only possible explanation other than the blatant notion that Tanya is just someone you're meant to hate. Even so, there was only one question tugging at the back of my mind; more than the others. Why isn't that Vampire out now?

Edward's sudden inadvertent sigh brought me out of my thoughts, bringing me back to the present, "What are you thinking about Bella?" I smirked instantly; he'd been fighting this question the whole time.

I paused for a moment, thinking about trying to lie about it, but immediately gave up on the idea. I might as well tell him, he'd find out eventually.

Avoiding his gaze, I shrugged, "Just how inexcusably unruly I was acting earlier. After everything they'd done for us…" -I hesitated to say it, and mumbled the rest- "I was acting like a monster." I waited for the grim response and the regret filled expression but I was surprised when I heard him chuckle, feeling the vibrations from it.

"Good." He abruptly stated, smiling crookedly, "They deserve the indignation, the ire." I narrowed my eyes at him, making his grin widen.

"You're supposed to make me feel better, not encourage this." I added bitterly, my throat flaring. Although I didn't want to admit it, part of me cherished the fact he approved, and it seemed like he knew as his expression turned almost smug, his hand absentmindedly stroking my hair.

"Well it's not my fault that you can't handle the truth." He replied matter-of-factly, grinning crookedly once again as my eyes narrowed, "But I do wonder, how was I not making you feel better? Is it an itch words can't scratch...?" I felt my mouth drop a little as his hand trailed from my arm to my neck. His question trailing off suggestively.

I gave him a reprimanding gaze. This was the last thing I expected him to say. Seeming to understand my scalding look, he raised an eyebrow, the amusement in his eyes undeniable. He was too tempting.

He chuckled, hesitating on the words, "…well, that's not what I was referring to…" He dropped his eyes for a moment, his hand lingering near my neck, "…but, okay." He allowed, staring up into my eyes behind his lashes, his fingers brushing along my cheek. His eyes smoldered.

I quickly looked away from his piercing gaze, trying to figure out how the conversation turned so suddenly – but I guess that was my fault or… was it?

He tried to hold my gaze, his smile growing wider every time I couldn't stop my eyes from wandering back to his.

I immediately felt the same strange sensation that my face was a bright scarlet; I scoffed at the very idea. I kept my face down, avoiding his penetrating gaze completely.

What a way to change the subject – it was that moment that my intuition kicked in.

I narrowed my eyes dangerously, "You're sidetracking me." Despite the fact that I am incapable of blushing, I felt like he knew I was anyway.

His eyes remained indifferent. Like a crook caught stealing, he smiled innocently. I bit my lip as I glowered at him, my sharp teeth feeling awkward on my soft skin. Trying desperately not to let his smoldering eyes dazzle me.

I scowled at him for a few minutes. Each time the clock ticked, my expression faltered a little. At long last, he sighed – possibly seeing this would get him nowhere.

"They deserved every bit of hostility you displayed." He assured me, a soft chuckle emitting from his lips, "The things Kate had in mind…" He mused, rolling his eyes, "The gruesome thoughts of Tanya." He immediately shot me a panicked glance as if he'd said too much.

It took me a moment to figure out the emotions that were pouring from me the instant he said her name; animosity the only one I could make out.

"_Gruesome_?" I questioned; the resentment evident in my voice.

Edward remained indifferent, his voice comforting, "_I_ thought it was gruesome." He admitted. I knew he didn't expect me to react the way I did, I knew I didn't. At once I felt my hand bunch into a fist, quivering where it laid, a low hiss escaping my lips.

Of course Tanya was thinking these things. Edward was the first one to decline to her affections, and like the siren she is, she wants what she wants and nothing is going to stop her until she gets it. She wants Edward for herself, completely disregarding the fact that _I _am bound to him for all eternity.

My eyes narrowed dangerously, snarling her name in my mind. '_Tanya…_' I thought viciously. She could never have him, he is mine.

Before I could even utter her name, the door to our room burst open, broken off its hinges; it flew forward to reveal a disgruntled snarling Tanya. I froze in my place, my eyes widened in shock as I watched Tanya bare her teeth, growls erupting from the back of her throat.

My muscles tightened instinctively, but the shock was too great to be thwarted by self-preservation.

"He could _never_ belong to you, he is _mine_!" She howled, crouching in the doorway, baring her teeth; she kept a reasonable distance from us. Only then did I notice Edward was keeping it that way.

He snarled with clenched teeth. Shifting into a crouch, but still under the covers with me, he matched Tanya's every movement.

I stared with wide eyes, shocked that Tanya looked even more of a Vampire than Edward did, and ever had.

Her eyes were no longer a sweet butterscotch, but a deep onyx black, seeming to pierce me in half with the intensity of their vicious gaze. I trembled.

Although I could hear Edward snarl his warning to stay away, I heard his voice calling my name; it growing louder each second in the distance.

Abruptly, Tanya's outraged features relaxed into a blank expression, her arms dropping at her sides, her growls ceasing. Then miraculously, she vanished into thin air.

I stared wide eyed at the spot Tanya once was. Doubting what I had just witnessed.

I could feel my chest rapidly rising and falling, my arms trembling at my sides. I turned to Edward for comfort, or at least tell me what was going on, but he wasn't there. My eyes widened at this realization, '_What's happening?_'

I felt my arms shake with such ferocity; I began to doubt it was me anymore.

I glanced around the room for any answers, and to find where Edward's voice was coming from. Almost immediately the room disappeared into nothingness; I froze in shock and confusion.

Edward's voice echoed through the darkness, calling my name repeatedly, the hysteria evident in his tone.

At last, the darkness cleared to reveal Edward above me, his expression frantic as he shook me, his right hand cupping my cheek.

"Bella? Bella talk to me! Bella?" His hand caressed my cheek, his tone softened as my eyes roamed over his features.

"What happened?" Suddenly aware of a throbbing in my head, I groaned. He stared at me curiously, but somehow relieved I responded.

"I don't exactly know." He answered, sounding as if he were admitting a horrible weakness, "I thought you fainted, but your eyes were still open. For ten minutes you were unresponsive, are you alright?" I nodded.

Letting the pulsing ebb away, I was finally able to take in his features. The bruises under his eyes were a deep purple, his once coral eyes now an onyx black with worry, and it seemed he was even paler. 

I closed my eyes for a split second; trying to remember what happened, I immediately saw Tanya's outraged features, heard her snarls, and the words she growled at me before crouching to attack. I shuddered away from the memory.

I shot upright in bed and turned my attention to the door; still attached to the hinges, unscathed. My eyebrows knitted. Was it all a dream?

"Bella…"

'_It seemed so vivid_'. It couldn't have been a dream, I was still conscious wasn't I? '_Was I?_'

This question bothered me more than it should have.

"Bella what's wrong?" Edward questioned loudly, bringing me out of my thoughts. Startled, I jumped; he must've asked me this already.

Using a softer tone, he asked again, "What's wrong Bella? Please tell me." He took my face between his hands as his warm breath blew across my face; my thoughts jumbled. Unthinkingly, I blurted anything I could remember.

"I... saw Tanya. She was angry with me - s-she broke the door and started yelling," I started, feeling like I should be committed to an insane asylum at the way he stared at me.

"I-I don't know if it was real or not," I added quickly, flushing inwardly, "But then she disappeared, and then you. The room too afterwards." I hesitated at the way he stared at me. Of all the emotions that flickered across his face; shock, I could see, was the strongest.

I instantly felt like I should be strapped down to a chair, muttering under my breath about the end of the world and whatnot. I sighed hopelessly.

Edward continued to gaze at me incredulously. Possibly questioning my sanity.

He seemed to be struggling on what to say. His mouth opened slightly, about to ask something, I presumed, when he suddenly turned to the door.

My body froze at the three quick raps on the other side of the door; fearing that it could be a fuming Tanya. Edward swiftly turned to me and held my face inches from his, his velvet soft voice comforting, easing the anxiety.

"It's alight Bella, it's just Alice."

I blinked, my expression blank, "Alice?"

"- Yes, Bella." Alice cut in. The second I heard the door handle jiggle, I jumped coming to my senses. Immediately breaking out of Edwards grasp and trance, I frantically began gathering an unnecessary amount of blankets around me.

"- Wait, Alice don't!" I squeaked. The door stopped short while I continued to gather the blankets around me, feeling unbelievably flustered.

From the corner of my eye, Edward stared at me, bewildered.

"What are you doing?" He asked, taking in my choice of cover.

"What does it look like I'm doing!" I hissed under my breath, tucking the corner of the blanket in the front, making sure it was stable enough so I could move toward the dresser without it falling. Comprehension filled his expression and I could see he was making an effort not to laugh.

"She's not going to wait that long." As if to prove his point, I heard a high musical voice start to complain, and the creak of the door opening wider.

"Come on Bella... It's not like I haven't seen you before." I rolled my eyes, feeling more embarrassed than anybody should in a lifetime.

Ignoring both of them, I held firmly onto the blankets around me, and bolted around the room.

I grabbed anything that touched my hand first and dashed into the bathroom before Alice could even open the door a centimeter wider.

Of course, too reckless in my haste, I tripped on my own feet through the bathroom doorway, but held onto the sink before I could fall; leaving a jagged outline of my hand in the marble with cracks running through it in all different directions.

"Careful Bella, all of this isn't exactly ours." Though her tone sounded like she was joking, it sounded like she meant it. She was suddenly behind me as she helped me up from my awkward position. I smiled sheepishly, making sure my gown of blankets were still wound around me.

I glanced at the mirror as Edward popped up fully clothed in his dark teal button up shirt and blue jeans behind her; his hair messier than usual; a look of concern filled his exquisite features.

The moment Alice grabbed my arm, a pair of dull red eyes glared feverishly back into my own. I gasped and jerked away from her grasp. My breath sounded ragged as I tried to bring it under control.

I could hear nothing but my own intake of breath. My head swirled, feeling light-headed. I steadied myself, leaning against the marble counter in an effort to level out the world.

I instantly became aware of the arms that were holding me; I didn't have to guess at who it was. I naturally expected to hear his voice, but I heard nothing.

"I'll _get Carlisle. Wait here and calm her down, I'll return with Jasper also._" I heard Alice say before I fell limply into his arms, blacking out.

**XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX**

AN: Ok chapter eight. Whew… I'm sorry if this seemed rushed but I needed to update. Some things have happened and I just lost track of time… ughhh.

I will apologize later I swear but to make you happier this will be cut up in pieces… so you still get the huge chapter just in pieces. I hope to update on this soon, and my new story I just posted 'Breathe Today'. It's on my profile so you should check it out.

I swear I will post thank you's when the whole hysteria chapter is over… I just wanted to post something for you guys…

Thank you so much for waiting and yeah… I really don't expect any forgiveness so go ahead and vent… I just need time to breathe. Hahaha

Until next time…. (SIGH)

BTW!! BREAKING DAWN WAS AWESOME!

But I'm not gonna lie… the beginning part kinda scared me. hahaha

Amanda out-

(Misery666 out-)


End file.
